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mmigration has a major impact on the society. Discuss both view and give your opinion

mmigration has a major impact on the society. Discuss both view and give your opinion y7LXd
In recent years, public discourse of whether immigration has benefited the host nations or not show no sign of abating. Although some economists have a positive thought because of the contribution of immigrants to the host country. I wholeheartedly concur with this idea as its drawbacks are more significant. Those who champion the belief that immigration has advantages might hinge their argument on the cheap workforce that immigration could offer to host nations. Since they can do work that the host countries might not wish to do or they might be filling skills gaps within a country, therefore helping balance the demographics in many countries in which have aging population, especially European nations. Take doctors and nurses in Germany hospitals as a typical example, who mainly came from undeveloped countries, and they are contributing their knowledge and skills to the overall growth of nation. However, I side with those who believe that this phenomenon could pose a myriad of problems for the host nations. First, high levels of immigration could damage the cohesiveness of communities. It is apparent that different languages and religions are the root reason to create conflicts amongst citizens, thereby leading to immensely divided communities and other social issues such as an increasing crime rate. Second, an incessant influx of people immigrating to a country could put a strain on the infrastructure and services of host nation. Therefore, authorities have to channel money, which is supposed to employ for other significant sectors for the country's development such as sciences or technologies, to aid these groups of immigrants, which could either dramatically slow down the economic progress or even destroy the prosperity of a nation. In conclusion, Although immigrants could help a host nation to have access to the abundant labor force which might solve to aging problems in some countries, The disadvantages of immigration are more disastrous and should be strictly restricted. 0 Comments
In recent years, public discourse of whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
has benefited the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
or not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of abating.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
economists have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the contribution of immigrants to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. I
wholeheartedly
concur with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
as its drawbacks are more significant.

Those who champion the belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
has advantages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
hinge their argument on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
workforce that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
could offer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. Since they can do work that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not wish to
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
do or
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be filling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
gaps within a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
therefore
helping balance the demographics in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in which have aging population,
especially
European
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. Take doctors and nurses in Germany hospitals as a typical example, who
mainly
came from undeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, and they are contributing their knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to the
overall
growth of nation.

However
, I side with those who believe that this phenomenon could pose a myriad of problems for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
First
, high levels of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
could damage the cohesiveness of communities. It is apparent that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
languages and religions are the root reason to create conflicts amongst citizens, thereby leading to
immensely
divided communities and other social issues such as an increasing crime rate. Second, an incessant influx of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
immigrating to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
could put a strain on the infrastructure and services of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
Therefore
, authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
channel money, which
is supposed
to employ for other significant sectors for the country's development such as sciences or technologies, to aid these groups of immigrants, which could either
dramatically
slow down the economic progress or even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the prosperity of a nation.

In conclusion
, Although immigrants could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
to have access to the abundant labor force which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
solve to aging problems in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, The disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
are more disastrous and should be
strictly
restricted.

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IELTS essay mmigration has a major impact on the society. Discuss both view and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
316 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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