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Medical science has greatly lengthened the average life span of most people. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Medical science has greatly lengthened the average life span of most people. qV18X
It is irrefutable that inventions in the field of medicine have prolonged the average human life. This essay agrees with this belief because medical science has given us tools to live longer and happier. This essay outlines how medicine has found a way to wipe off many dangerous dieseases followed by the progress made in surgeries that has increased the life expectancy phenomenally. In the olden days, medical science had no means to prevent or cure some of the illnesses. But today, they have found preventative cures of so many life threatning dieseases if form of vaccines which has helped circumvent their onset. With these vaccines, there are many fatal dieseases that are completely eradicated from the world. For Example, In the past two decades there are nearly zero reports of Polio among children in India. It was a famous belief in the past, that there are some organs which if failed, humans cannot survive. Doctors have made exponential progress in the field of surgeories allowing people to live quite a long life even after a critical organ failure, for example, it is reported that almost 70% of cardiac arrest patients have survived and led a normal life for around 10-15 years after a successful heart transplant operation. In summary, by preventing life ending dieseases and innovations in medical surgeories, medical science have definetely pushed up the average life length in human beings.
It is irrefutable that inventions in the field of medicine have prolonged the average human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
with this belief
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
us tools to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer and happier. This essay outlines how medicine has found a way to wipe off
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
Possible spelling mistake found.
dieseases
followed by the progress made in surgeries that has increased the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy
phenomenally
.

In the olden days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science had no means to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
or cure
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
illnesses.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, they have found preventative cures of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Use "much" or "little" with uncountable nouns.
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
Possible spelling mistake found.
threatning
Possible spelling mistake found.
dieseases
if form of vaccines which has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
circumvent their onset. With these vaccines, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fatal
Possible spelling mistake found.
dieseases
that are completely eradicated from the world.
For Example
, In the past two decades there are
nearly
zero reports of Polio among children in India.

It was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
belief in the past, that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
organs which
Did you mean "is"?
if
failed, humans cannot survive. Doctors have made exponential progress in the field of
Possible spelling mistake found.
surgeories
allowing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
quite a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
even after a critical organ failure,
for example
, it
is reported
that almost 70% of cardiac arrest patients have survived and led a normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for around 10-15 years after a successful heart transplant operation.

In summary, by preventing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
ending
Possible spelling mistake found.
dieseases
and innovations in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
Possible spelling mistake found.
surgeories
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
science have
Possible spelling mistake found.
definetely
pushed up the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
length in human beings.
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IELTS essay Medical science has greatly lengthened the average life span of most people.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
233 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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