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Many youngsters these days know more about the stars of the world stage or cinema than about famous people in the history of their country. Why is this? What can be done to get young people interested in their country’s history?

Many youngsters these days know more about the stars of the world stage or cinema than about famous people in the history of their country. Why is this? What can be done to get young people interested in their country’s history? M3nGQ
It is often claimed that, todays youngsters have more information about the film stars compared to famous person in the history of their nation. This might be possible because of lack of spreading awareness about greatest people of country. Also, to make interest among them authorities have to teach the younger ones about sacrifice of well-known people. Most of the teenagers have less knowledge about histories of their countries citizen as of insufficient recognition regarding past history. Adolescents are keener to follow superstar of film and cinema so they do not aware about real life heroes. Moreover, youth mostly prefer to live in presents and love to know about how celebrities live their life and try to follow them. It could ultimately divert their focus from history of nation and hard work of freedom fighters. For example, times of India revealed in one interview that, only 30 adults of India know about chatrapati sivaji who is well known king in past. To resolve this issue and get young one interested in history governments have to launch a campaign to teach the adolescents. This will direct the teenagers about their history and hard work done by past celebrities for their nation. Furthermore, advertising effective past and giving lot of detail information can catch the attention of adults so will help to develop more curiosity about famous people. For instance, in India, after running of one show on lifestyle of Gandhi (nation of father), 90% students are come in front as a volunteer to run this campaign forward. To conclude, in modern era youngsters have less knowledge about famous people in nation’s history than about hero and heroine of reels life. This may occur as of less advertisement of shows regarding to life style of people who are well known in past generations. The possible solution about this problem is to learn the adults about how good they did in their life and what kind of struggle they did.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
claimed that,
Possible spelling mistake found.
todays
youngsters have more information about the film stars compared to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
person in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. This might be possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lack of spreading awareness about
A determiner is probably missing here: "the greatest".
greatest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of country.
Also
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
interest among them authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
teach the younger ones about sacrifice of well-known
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
have less knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
histories
of their countries citizen as of insufficient recognition regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. Adolescents are keener to follow superstar of film and cinema
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not aware about real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
heroes.
Moreover
, youth
mostly
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in presents and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to know about how celebrities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and try to follow them. It could
ultimately
divert their focus from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work of freedom fighters.
For example
, times of India revealed in one interview that,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
30 adults of India know about
Possible spelling mistake found.
chatrapati
Possible spelling mistake found.
sivaji
who is well known king
Did you mean: "in the past"?
in past
.

To resolve this issue and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
young one interested in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
launch a campaign to teach the adolescents. This will direct the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work done by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
celebrities for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
Furthermore
, advertising effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
and giving
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
detail information can catch the attention of adults
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to develop more curiosity about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
, in India, after running of one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
on lifestyle of Gandhi
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
(nation
of father), 90% students are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
The usual preposition for "in front" is "of". Did you mean "in front of"?
in front as
a volunteer to run this campaign forward.

To conclude
, in modern era youngsters have less knowledge about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
than about hero and heroine of reels
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. This may occur as of less
The usual collocation for "advertisement" is "for" not "of". Did you mean "advertisement for"?
advertisement of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
The phrase 'regarding to' is not correct. Use "regarding" or "regard to".
regarding to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are well known in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
generations. The possible solution about this problem is to learn the adults about how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
they did in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and what kind of struggle they did.
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IELTS essay Many youngsters these days know more about the stars of the world stage or cinema than about famous people in the history of their country. Why is this? What can be done to get young people interested in their country’s history?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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