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Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved? v.1

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved? v. 1
The retail business has become very competitive and small retailers are finding it very difficult to survive in presence of large supermarkets. This main impacts of this on the local communities including job losses and monopolised market. This can be changes by applying some changes, including a partnership based business model and improved government regulation. To begin with, closure of local retail shops will result in a severe job crisis as they are the primary source of income for a lot of local communities. In addition, presence of only large supermarkets in retail business will result in higher inflation. For example, a recent study conducted tells that if the current situation continues, the unemployment and inflation rates will be at their peak since last decade. This will not only impact lives of local communities but also have a widespread impact on the economy. Small size retail shops should think of some partnership based model that can help them increase their profession size and scope to be able to compete with large retailers. Furthermore, government should create an atmosphere where retailers can approach investment firms to raise capital in order to grow their business. For instance, there are various investment summits conducted by governments where various companies and investment firms come together. Government should make such platforms available for local retail business as well. This will not only help small retailers survive but in fact will give them opportunity to grow, create more jobs and provide a larger contribution towards the growth of the economy. In conclusion, in today’s competitive business environment small local shops are finding it very difficult to sustain and compete with large brands. This essay discussed how closure of local retail shops will result in job loss and increase inflation. This essay also suggested solutions to this problem are two fold: local retailers should come together and have partnerships and the platforms government should provide that will enable local retailers to not just survive but also grow.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
competitive and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
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retailers
are finding it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to survive in presence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
supermarkets. This main impacts of this on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
losses and
Possible spelling mistake. 'monopolised' is British English.
monopolised
market. This can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
by applying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
, including a partnership based
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business
model and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
regulation.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, closure of
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local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
will result in a severe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
crisis as they are the primary source of income for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities.
In addition
, presence of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
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large
supermarkets in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
will result in higher inflation.
For example
, a recent study conducted
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
that if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation continues, the unemployment and inflation rates will be at their peak since last decade. This will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
impact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
have a widespread impact on the economy.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Small
size
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retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
partnership based model that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them increase their profession size and scope to be able to compete with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retailers
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should create an atmosphere where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retailers
can approach investment firms to raise capital in order to grow their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
.
For instance
, there are various investment summits conducted by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
where various
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and investment firms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
such platforms available for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
as well
. This will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
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retailers
survive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in fact will give them opportunity to grow, create more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and provide a larger contribution towards the growth of the economy.

In conclusion
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
are finding it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to sustain and compete with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
brands. This essay discussed how closure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
will result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
loss and increase inflation. This essay
also
suggested solutions to this problem are
The adjective or adverb 'twofold' needs to be written as one word.
two fold
:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retailers
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
together and have partnerships and the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "platforms'" or "platform's"?
platforms
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide that will enable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retailers
to not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
survive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
grow.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
44Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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