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Many people want their country to host an international sporting event. Others believe that international sporting events bring more problems than benefits. Discuss both views and your opinion. v.5

Many people want their country to host an international sporting event. Others believe that international sporting events bring more problems than benefits. v. 5 xwA1
Hosting an international sporting even has positive and negative sides. some people support the idea from a financial perspective. in this case, the country will become a tourist destination to probably hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world. Consequently, this will help recruit many employees and help the country create more jobs. This is what happened when south Africa hosted Football World cup. On the other hand, the oppositions to this idea will think about security alert in the light of having too many people from different culture at one place during the same period of time. This probably will open the door for fights, thefts operations as well as racism in some cases. Look at last Olympics held in China as an example.
Hosting an international sporting even has
positive
and
negative
sides.
some
people
support the
idea
from a financial perspective.
in
this case, the country will become a tourist destination to
probably
hundreds of thousands of
people
from all over the world.
Consequently
, this will
help
recruit
many
employees and
help
the country create more jobs. This is what happened when
south Africa
hosted Football World cup.

On the other hand
, the oppositions to this
idea
will
think
about security alert in the light of having too
many
people
from
different
culture at one place during the same period of time. This
probably
will open the door for fights, thefts operations
as well
as racism in
some
cases. Look at last Olympics held in China as an example.
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IELTS essay Many people want their country to host an international sporting event. Others believe that international sporting events bring more problems than benefits. v. 5

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
127 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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