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Many people use distance learning programmes to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people use distance learning programmes to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending college or university. Qy9b
Education play vital role in the life of human beings. With the advancements of technology, new gadgets are launched for learning easily such as mobile phones, laptops and computers. Owing to this fact, several masses use technological things like mobile phones for easily learning or to study at home, while other opine that it cannot bring the advantages afford by joining college or any university. However, I would be agree to a great extent with this statement and discussing in upcoming paragraph. To embark on, with the regards to the benefits of attending college or university are more convenient rather than to study at home. To be justified, peoples acquire lots of knowledge by studying at colleges. They can learn easily by going at university rather than at their home. For example, in many countries, lots of changes occured to make study convenient and comfortable. As smart classes are required from this people learn easily. Consequently, it made masses more knowledgeable and require lots of changes in their further studies. It also helps them to complete their desires. Furthermore, to study at colleges or universities, it is also beneficial to show their talent and creativity first and foremost, in college competitions are also held and by some activities people can show their talent and it may help them to get success in their life. For instance, some competitions such as singing, dancing, art, competition and so on. Hence, with the help of this it create competition among the learners and it is also mandatory to understand them easily by some activities and to show their talent in the front of public. On the other hand, benefits of studying at home cannot be neglected. To be specified, learning from technological documents such as mobile phones, laptops and so on. It also make life easier of people. Masses can acquire any kind of information by researching on google. As, by watching study related things, it is more convenient to learn at their homes. For example, due to Corona pandemic, no one was able to go outside from their homes. For this online classes were held and the students learnt on their mobile phones. , to study at their home has widened the knowledge of masses and made them capable to learn more things with the help of internet. To recapitulate, as per my above discussion, I personally believe that to study at universities or colleges is more comfortable and convenient rather than studying at their home. As masses show their talent and creativity by taking part in some activities which is only possible while going to colleges rather than in their home.
Education
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "plays".
play
vital role in the life of human beings. With the advancements of technology, new gadgets
are launched
for learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
such as mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
, laptops and computers. Owing to this fact, several masses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
technological things like mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
learning or to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at home, while other opine that it cannot bring the advantages afford by joining college or any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
However
, I would be
Consider using the past participle "agreed"?
agree
to a great extent with this statement and discussing in upcoming paragraph.

To embark on, with the regards to the benefits of attending college or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rather
than to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at home. To
be justified
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
acquire lots of knowledge by studying at colleges. They can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
by going at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rather
than at their home.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenient
and comfortable.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
smart classes
are required
from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
.
Consequently
, it made masses more knowledgeable and require lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in their
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. It
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them to complete their desires.

Furthermore
, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at colleges or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
, it is
also
beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
and creativity
first
and foremost, in college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitions
are
also
held and by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
activities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
and it may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
success in their life.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competitions
such as singing, dancing, art,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Hence
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of this it
Did you mean "creates"?
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
competition
among the learners and it is
also
mandatory to understand them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
activities and to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
in the front of public.

On the other hand
, benefits of studying at home cannot
be neglected
. To
be specified
, learning from technological documents such as mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
, laptops and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. It
also
Did you mean "makes"?
make
life easier of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Masses can acquire any kind of information by researching on google. As, by watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
related things, it is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenient
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
at their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
.
For example
, due to Corona pandemic, no one was able to go outside from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. For this online classes
were held
and the students
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt on
their mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
.
Loose punctuation mark.
,
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at their home has widened the knowledge of masses and made them capable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
more things with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of internet.

To recapitulate, as per my above discussion, I
personally
believe that to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
or colleges is more comfortable and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rather
than studying at their home. As masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
and creativity by taking part in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
activities which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
possible while going to colleges
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rather
than in their home.
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IELTS essay Many people use distance learning programmes to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefit as much as attending college or university.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
440 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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