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Many people think that volunteering must be made an important part of high school programs. To what extent do you agree and disagree.

Many people think that volunteering must be made an important part of high school programs. j8D3X
Many are of the opinion that partaking in extracurricular activities must be made an integral part of the primary school programs. I personally, share my beliefs with the majority populous, and in this essay, I will be sharing the reasons why I consider volunteering should be made a major part of high school programs in detail. Firstly, the most important reason that influenced my beliefs is that the significance it has in developing various soft skills in young children. For instance, volunteering and helping out at orphanages and nursing homes can humble the learners and make them more compassionate towards others. It also helps them in getting better at various disciplinaries of life, like, knowledge transfer to the younger students, and developing confidence. Secondly, when considering pursuing higher studies abroad, many competitive universities and colleges take into account all the other activities that a student had done apart from academics. These activities help the institute in skimming the best applicants from a myriad of student applications. Indeed, offering services for the betterment of society helps in making the learner's resume stand out from others. To summarize, it is evident that getting involved in volunteering provides plenty of benefits to the students. It helps them in improving their life skills by making them more considerable and responsible towards others and also opens up new doors for them to advance in their professional life. Hence, in my opinion, high schools must encourage students in extending their hand in support for others by including volunteering in the school programs.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
are of the opinion that partaking in extracurricular activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be made
an integral part of the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
programs. I
personally
, share my beliefs with the majority populous, and in this essay, I will be sharing the reasons why I consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
should
be made
a major part of high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
programs in detail.

Firstly
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reason that influenced my beliefs is that the significance it has in developing various soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in young children.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
and helping out at orphanages and nursing homes can humble the learners and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them more compassionate towards others. It
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them in getting better at various
Possible spelling mistake found.
disciplinaries
of life, like, knowledge transfer to the younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, and developing confidence.

Secondly
, when considering pursuing higher studies abroad,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
competitive universities and colleges take into account all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
activities that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
had done apart from academics. These activities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
the institute in skimming the best applicants from a myriad of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
applications.
Indeed
, offering services for the betterment of society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
in making the learner's resume stand out from others.

To summarize
, it is evident that getting involved in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of benefits to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them in improving their life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
by making them more considerable and responsible towards others and
also
opens up new doors for them to advance in their professional life.
Hence
, in my opinion, high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in extending their hand in support for others by including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
programs.

IELTS essay Many people think that volunteering must be made an important part of high school programs.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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