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Many people prefer to watch foreign movies then domestic domestic movies. What is the reason behind this? Should government give financial aid to to help local films?

Many people prefer to watch foreign movies then domestic domestic movies. What is the reason behind this? Should government give financial aid to to help local films? Lw63n
The entertainment industry has undergone dynamic changes in the past decades. the people have also changed their preferences in movies from domestic films to foreign ones. This essay discusses about the various reasons behind this change. Firstly, people tend to watch globally produced movies due the better visualisation effects and graphics. In local films, the producers are unable to bring such a traction due to the low budget invested by them. For instance, many filmmakers produce films by hiring actors with high remuneration and hence they are often not able to cope up with all other extra expenses. Therefore, people are inclined towards movies with better quality than the ordinary ones. However, the government can support domestic movies provided that such films does not imply any anti social message to the community. The authority can provide financial is to a bring the value of such cinemas. For example, if the government allows subsidiary to produce films, the truth behind the film making can purchase high resolution equipments for audio and video purposes. Thus, people would have a tendency to watch such films.
The entertainment industry has undergone dynamic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the past decades.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
their preferences in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
from domestic films to foreign ones. This essay
Did you mean simply "discusses the"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discusses about the
various reasons behind this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
globally produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
due the better
Possible spelling mistake. 'visualisation' is British English.
visualisation
effects and graphics. In local films, the producers are unable to bring such a traction due to the low budget invested by them.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
filmmakers produce films by hiring actors with high remuneration and
hence
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
not able to cope up with all other extra expenses.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are inclined
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
with better quality than the ordinary ones.

However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can support domestic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
provided that such films does not imply any
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
anti social
message to the community. The authority can provide financial is to
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'bring' is correct. If 'bring' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a bring
the value of such cinemas.
For example
, if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
subsidiary to produce films, the truth behind the film making can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
high resolution equipments for audio and video purposes.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would have a tendency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
such films.

IELTS essay Many people prefer to watch foreign movies then domestic domestic movies. What is the reason behind this? Should government give financial aid to to help local films?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
182 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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