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Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries? 07V9
A great number of general viewers opted to watch foreign films due to its high-quality cinematography and flawless story-telling. A plethora of international films depict different storyline that is more unusual and interesting than domestic films. Furthermore, audiences give great attention to foreign artists who are attractive and enticing to local viewers. A good example of this is the Korean wave that swept across the globe. There has been a steady increase of interest in Korean films and series in other parts of the world, particularly in Asia, as they gain more and more viewers. As a matter of fact, Netlix Asia has decided to invest more in Korean movies and series as it has a huge demand in Philippines, Singapore, Indonesia, Japan, China, Malaysia, etc. Hence, 7 out of 10 popular shows in Netlix are mostly Korean. With the popularity of International films, the local film industry has been slowly dying out due to its less demand from the audiences. National Government should provide financial assistance to local film industries by subsidizing a portion of the movie expenses to lower down the costs, and at the same time, help local producers to focus the money on producing high quality films. Furthermore, government should increase the ticket price for international movies to lessen the tight competition between foreign and domestic films. Through this financial support, local films would be able to survive and thrive in the global market. In conclusion, A plethora of General Audiences prefer to patronize international films than domestic films due to its interesting storyline, stunning actors, and outstanding cinematography. As a result, local film industry is hardly surviving and a financial support from the government will be a great help to keep the industry moving and stay relevant in globally competitive market by funding costs in making movies and increase the ticket price for foreign films.
A great number of general viewers opted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films due to its high-quality cinematography and flawless story-telling. A plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
films depict
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
storyline
that is
more unusual and interesting than domestic films.
Furthermore
, audiences give great attention to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
artists who are attractive and enticing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
viewers. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example of this is the Korean wave that swept across the globe. There has been a steady increase of interest in Korean films and series in other parts of the world,
particularly
in Asia, as they gain more and more viewers. As a matter of fact,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Netlix
Asia has decided to invest more in Korean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and series as it has a huge demand
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the Philippines".
in Philippines
, Singapore, Indonesia, Japan, China, Malaysia, etc.
Hence
, 7 out of 10 popular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Netlix
are
mostly
Korean.

With the popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
International
films, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
has been
slowly
dying out due to its less demand from the audiences. National
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should provide financial assistance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
by subsidizing a portion of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
expenses to lower down the costs, and at the same time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
producers to focus the money on producing high quality films.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should increase the ticket price for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
to lessen the tight competition between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
and domestic films. Through this financial support,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
films would be able to survive and thrive in the global market.

In conclusion
, A plethora of General Audiences prefer to patronize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
films than domestic films due to its interesting storyline, stunning actors, and outstanding cinematography.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
is hardly surviving and a financial support from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will be a great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
moving and stay relevant in globally competitive market by funding costs in making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and increase the ticket price for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
films.
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IELTS essay Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
310 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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