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Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. To what extent do you agree with this view? What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life? v.5

Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life? v. 5
People who determined their majors early in their life and followed it are likely to satisfy with their works. I personally agree with this idea to some extents and several actions could be done to obtain that satisfaction. On the one hand, a well preparation can lead to career satisfaction. When a young individual decided and committed to a major, he or she then would try to acquire a needed education and skills to have a concrete foundation before entering a competitive job market. Therefore, that young person might have gotten a job easier and built up more experience over time, which gradually resulted in receiving many recognitions and a sense of career contentment eventually. Nonetheless, this might not be the true if they did not have a passion for what they had chosen. A numerous surveys have also shown that personal preference would change multiple times during a working life. This is one of the reasons why, after working a long time, several people would wish to change their career path when they found a distinct thing, which they felt happy and was willing to devote for, despite of having had significant achievements in that pathway. On the other hand, to have a satisfying working life, having in-depth conversations with as many seniors as possible probably a first basic step. Because experienced people can give a lot of valuable advices for those who graduate from high school needing inputs to choose an academic or a vocational education. Another suggestion can be considered that is to share career’s expectations with employees during the interview and prior to accepting a job offer letter. This enables employers and companies to have a mutual understanding to collaborate well together in the future, in which both sides can boost each other to fulfill shared development goals. In conclusion, to have an early decision and commitment would bring a career path contentment, but in a long term, there are many other things should be done to achieve it.
People
who determined their majors early in their life and followed it are likely to satisfy with their works. I
personally
agree
with this
idea
to
some
extents and several actions could
be done
to obtain that satisfaction.

On the one hand, a well preparation can lead to
career
satisfaction. When a young individual decided and committed to a major, he or she then would try to acquire a needed education and
skills
to have a concrete foundation
before
entering a competitive job market.
Therefore
, that young person might have gotten a job easier and built up more experience over time, which
gradually
resulted in receiving
many
recognitions and a sense of
career
contentment
eventually
. Nonetheless, this might not be the true if they did not have a passion for what they had chosen. A numerous
surveys
have
also
shown that personal preference would
change
multiple times during a working life. This is one of the reasons why, after working a long time, several
people
would wish to
change
their
career
path when they found a distinct thing, which they felt happy and was willing to devote for,
despite of
having had significant achievements in that pathway.

On the other hand
, to have a satisfying working life, having in-depth conversations with as
many
seniors as possible
probably
a
first
basic step.
Because
experienced
people
can give
a lot of
valuable advices for those who graduate from high school needing inputs to choose an academic or a vocational education. Another suggestion can
be considered
that is
to share
career’s
expectations with employees during the interview and prior to accepting a job offer letter. This enables employers and
companies
to have a mutual
understanding to collaborate
well together in the future, in which both sides can boost each other to fulfill shared development goals.

In conclusion
, to have an early decision and commitment would bring a
career
path contentment,
but
in a long term, there are
many
other things should
be done
to achieve it.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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