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Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced? JRPw
Movies has been one of the best forms of entertainment for decades. However, the content shown in films should not cause harm to the society. In this essay, I will discuss few problems with the level of violence shown in the movies and propose few solutions to prevent them. One of the most common problem we see in our societies is the brutal crimes such as murders. Though the movies are just for entertainment, few people tend to get encouraged by the violence shown in them and apply it in the real life. For example, we have seen many criminals who have committed crimes in a fashion similar to one shown in movies. In order to avoid such problems, the other genres of movies, such as romance, comedy, etc. , should be promoted, and the censor boards should put some restrictions on crime movies. The other problems with the level of violence shown in movies include its negative effect on children. While cinema theatres do not allow children to watch the movies which have age restriction, children can still watch them on television at home. To overcome such problems, parents must keep an eye on their children and should restrict them from watching such movies. Parents should opt-out the channels, which show violent content, from their service provider. To summarize, though it is censor boards' responsibility to restrict the violent content from being shown in movies, they cannot be blamed completely as some level of violence is needed to be shown in some cinemas for amusement. As a preventive measure, parents should protect their children from watching it.
Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "movie has".
Movies has
been one of the best forms of entertainment for decades.
However
, the content shown in films should not cause harm to the society. In this essay, I will discuss few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
with the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
shown in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and propose few solutions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
them.

One of the most common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in our societies is the brutal crimes such as murders. Though the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for entertainment, few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
encouraged by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
shown in them and apply it in the real life.
For example
, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
criminals who have committed crimes in a fashion similar to one shown in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. In order to avoid such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, the other genres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, such as romance, comedy, etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
should
be promoted
, and the censor boards should put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
restrictions on crime movies.

The other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
with the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
shown in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
include its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. While cinema
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
which have age restriction,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
them on television at home. To overcome such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
an eye on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and should restrict them from watching such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. Parents should opt-out the channels, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
violent content, from their service provider.

To summarize
, though it is censor boards' responsibility to restrict the violent content from
being shown
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, they cannot
be blamed
completely as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
is needed
to
be shown
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cinemas for amusement. As a preventive measure, parents should protect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from watching it.
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IELTS essay Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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