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Many people believe that living in cities offers greater benefits compare to the life in countryside.To what extent do you agree or disagree..

Many people believe that living in cities offers greater benefits compare to the life in countryside. . Eq2oD
Nowadays, a number of people prefer to migrate to metropolitan cities. I will largely agrees with this statement due to cities provide vast amount of opportunities and better lifestyle. To commence with, there are various reasons of living in cities. First and foremost point is that vast job opportunities offers in cities which can uplift the standard of living. This is because at present, individuals can do jobs according to their choice as well as earn good salary packages and complete their requirements and dreams in life. In USA, for example, a recent study was done by BBC news revealed that huge area of villages migrate to metropolitan areas in last few decades. Thus, many evidence clear that cities much beneficial for their future life. Furthermore, there are multifarious amenities which provides metropolitan land such as good education system, transportation, better hospital services as well in cities. To explain it, people who are living in cities they will get a chance to take the benefits of town services and they easily move one place to another with the help of transport and can save lot of time. Therefore, cities plays an essential part of their further life. On the contrary, there are some merits of residence in outskirts places. Firstly, they can enjoy fresh environment in villages. To explain it, villages is situated very far from cities as, the countryside areas free from pollution and the life expectancy has been increased. Thus, village life is much more beneficial for living. To conclude, there are both advantages of living in villages and cities both are provided multiple facilities to individuals. Like as transportation, education.
Nowadays, a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to migrate to metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. I will
largely
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "agree"
agrees
with this statement due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
provide vast amount of opportunities and better lifestyle.

To commence with, there are various reasons of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
First
and foremost point is that vast job opportunities offers in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
which can uplift the standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
at present, individuals can do jobs according to their choice
as well
as earn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary packages and complete their requirements and dreams in life.
A determiner is probably missing here: "In the USA".
In USA
,
for example
, a recent study
was done
by BBC news revealed that huge area of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
migrate to metropolitan areas in last few decades.
Thus
,
Possible agreement error. The noun evidence seems to be uncountable; consider using: "much evidence", "a good deal of evidence".
many evidence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
much beneficial for their future life.

Furthermore
, there are multifarious amenities which provides metropolitan land such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education system, transportation, better hospital services
as well
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to take the benefits of town
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
services and
they
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
one place to another with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of transport and can save
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
time.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
plays an essential part of their
further
life.

On the contrary
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
merits of residence in outskirts places.
Firstly
, they can enjoy fresh environment in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
is situated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
far from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
as, the countryside areas free from pollution and the life expectancy has
been increased
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
life is much more beneficial for living.

To conclude
, there are both advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
both
are provided
multiple facilities to individuals. Like as transportation, education.
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IELTS essay Many people believe that living in cities offers greater benefits compare to the life in countryside. .

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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