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Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this? v.5

Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this? v. 5
Nowadays, people can easily borrow money from banks. There are someone who is without repaying ability, and it is the reason why the problems of economy and society increase quickly. This essay will discuss advantages and disadvantages when people are able to use credit cards or loans easily. There are some disadvantages if people can have financial resources to easily their need. The growth of credit helps economy to be stronger, for companies sell a lot of goods. Moreover, if banks are simple to lend money, clients do not need find another financial institution, such as mafia. Other way, banks can lose chance to earn more sales because credit process are more difficult. People will be in danger by using illegal financial instruments. On the other hand, banks maybe not collect money when they have simple credit policies. People use too much money without repaying ability instead of controlling their expenditure. Consequently, crime rate will grow in society, and the economy crisis happen when there are many banks not to receive money from customers. It is so dangerous for countries having too much bad debt. An economy can be collapsed because government does not manage the credit activities in banks. For example, in 2008, the crisis happened in the USA, for banks lent to money for people not have ability to repay. This event impacted on the global economy, and there were many countries taking a long time to recover. In conclusion, credit activity helps countries to be grown, but it can be one of causes of crisis. This is an important factor in society and economy. However, banks should consider carefully before lending money. Besides, people have to control the financial ability, and have reasonably spending.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
borrow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
. There are someone who is without repaying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
, and it is the reason why the problems of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
and society increase
quickly
. This essay will discuss advantages and disadvantages when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
cards or loans
easily
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
resources to
easily
their need. The growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
to be stronger, for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
sell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.
Moreover
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
are simple to lend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, clients do not need
Did you mean "to find"?
find
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
institution, such as mafia. Other way,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
can lose chance to earn more sales
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
process are more difficult.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will be in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
by using illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
instruments.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
maybe not collect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
when they have simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
policies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
without repaying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
instead
of controlling their expenditure.
Consequently
, crime rate will grow in society, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
crisis happen when there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
not to receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from customers. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for countries having too much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
debt. An
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
can
be collapsed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
does not manage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
activities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
.
For example
, in 2008, the crisis happened in the USA, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
lent to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to repay. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
impacted on the global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
, and there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries taking a long time to recover.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
credit
activity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
countries to
be grown
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can be one of causes of crisis. This is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor in society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banks
should consider
carefully
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
lending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
Besides
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
, and have
reasonably
spending.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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