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Many people are moving from rural areas to big cities. Why has this happened? To what extent do you think it is a good trend?

Many people are moving from rural areas to big cities. Why has this happened? Brqp
Nowadays, there are a growing number of people who move from the countryside to urban areas. They move to cities for better job prospects as well as better quality of lives though I think this trend would enlarge the gap between rural areas and cities. a number of people move to urban areas for desirable work because of abundant labor demand in cities. In rural areas, numerous industries are usually not well-developed and they do not require many workers. Therefore, if local people do not move to cities, it will be hard for them to get a job, no longer a suitable job. For example, some rural areas only have few small companies and they do not need serious risk management. As a result, a professional risk manager can fail to be employed in these places. Also, cities have better infrastructures than countryside and people who stay in cities live more convenient lives. Cities have various kinds of facilities satisfying different needs of people. For instance, people living in a prosperous city can travel to nearly any part of the city by underground. In contrast, it will be much more challenging for a person who live in rural areas to achieve the same goal because some countries even have no public facilities. In my opinion, rural-to-urban shift enlarges the gap between rural areas and urban areas. Numerous people’s movement to cities causes the labor shortage of countryside while cities possess more labor supplies. With more people constructing cities, cities can develop rapidly and their GDP can also increase dramatically at the expense of the development of remote areas. In conclusion, many people move to cities in search of higher standard of lives and more promising employment prospects although the rural-to-urban shift widens the gap between rural areas and urban areas.
Nowadays, there are a growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
from the countryside to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
for better job prospects
as well
as better quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
though I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this trend would enlarge the gap between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
and cities.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
for desirable work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of abundant labor demand in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, numerous industries are
usually
not
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
well-developed and
they do not require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
workers.
Therefore
, if local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, it will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job, no longer a suitable job.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
companies and
they do not need serious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
management.
As a result
, a professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
manager can fail to
be employed
in these places.

Also
,
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cities
have better infrastructures than countryside and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who stay in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
more convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
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Cities
have various kinds of facilities satisfying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
needs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in a prosperous city can travel to
nearly
any part of the city by underground.
In contrast
, it will be much more challenging for a person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
to achieve the same goal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries even have no public facilities.

In my opinion, rural-to-urban shift enlarges the gap between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. Numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
movement to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
causes the labor shortage of countryside while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
possess more labor supplies. With more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
can develop
rapidly
and their GDP can
also
increase
dramatically
at the expense of the development of remote areas.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in search of higher standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
and more promising employment prospects although the rural-to-urban shift widens the gap between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
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IELTS essay Many people are moving from rural areas to big cities. Why has this happened?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
300 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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