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Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by news ones. How important is it to maintain old buildings? Should history stand in the way of progress?

Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by news ones. How important is it to maintain old buildings? Should history stand in the way of progress? xy5y
In a regard of the recent discussion of the importance of non-used establishments, I should explain whether they need to be obliterated or turned to community center. To begin with, old warehouse become needless because most of them might be historical or they lost their direct purpose. Besides, as time goes on, it is predictably that new technologies and improvements will be accepted in order to make buildings stronger and reliable. That is why, In my considered opinion, the best way is to take down these buildings because I do not believe that some technics can make them better. On the other hand, sometimes they can be made for flats to people of need. Moreover, for such purpose engineering standards to use these building is less significant than for different business. In addition, for those people who do not have a place to live in it is a good decision because a new flat is extremely costly that is why this solution would deal this problem. To sum up, I am convinced that these establishments need to be destroyed, however, if it is required such warehouse could be used for a living place for poor people.
In a regard of the recent discussion of the importance of non-
used
establishments, I should
explain
whether they need to
be obliterated
or turned to community center.

To
begin
with,
old
warehouse become needless
because
most of them might be
historical or
they lost their direct purpose.
Besides
, as time goes on, it is
predictably
that new technologies and improvements will be
accepted
in order to
make
buildings stronger and reliable.
That is
why, In my considered opinion, the best way is to take down these buildings
because
I do not believe that
some
technics
can
make
them better.

On the other hand
,
sometimes
they can
be made
for flats to
people
of need.
Moreover
, for such purpose engineering standards to
use
these building is less significant than for
different
business.
In addition
, for those
people
who do not have a place to
live
in it is a
good
decision
because
a new flat is
extremely
costly
that is
why this solution would deal this problem.

To sum up, I
am convinced
that these establishments need to be
destroyed
,
however
, if it
is required
such warehouse could be
used
for a living place for poor
people
.
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IELTS essay Many old buildings protected by law are part of a nation’s history. Some people think they should be knocked down and replaced by news ones. How important is it to maintain old buildings? Should history stand in the way of progress?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
196 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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