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Many museums charge for admission while others are free.do you think that the advantages of charging people for admission to museum outweigh the disadvantages

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. do you think that the advantages of charging people for admission to museum outweigh the disadvantages AO1X
Museum is a most visited place in any country. Museum provides knowledge to people most. People visit there to know the culture, heritage etc. For admission many Museum fix a prize. In this situation, I strongly believe that the disadvantages of charging for admission to museum outweigh the advantages. Firstly, Museum is national property. Everyone has to right to visit museum. Charging for admission to museum in an interfere on the people right. Secondly, by the charging for admission to museum has a very big harm, that is reduce of visitor proportion. For charging on admission to museum people decrease their visit to museum, for that reason the main purpose of Museum, providing knowledge, will be blocked. If people do not visit Museum then what is the benefit of Museum. Moreover, the Museum authority often say that, the charging people for admission to to museum is done because of improvement of Museum facilities and to increase the staff members, but it is a weak point, whene for charging visit ratio is being declined so what will become by the more facilities. In conclusion, it is clear that, the disadvantages of charging people for admission to museum outweigh the advantages. Although there is an advantage for Museum authority to fix a prise but overall there are many disadvantages than advantages.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
is a most visited place in any country.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
provides knowledge to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
most.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
there to know the culture, heritage etc. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
a prize. In this situation, I
strongly
believe that the disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
outweigh the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
is national property. Everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
right to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Charging
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in
After 'an', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'interfere' is correct. If 'interfere' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
an interfere
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
right.
Secondly
, by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
harm,
that is
Consider using a past participle here: "reduced".
reduce
of visitor proportion. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
decrease their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
, for that reason the main purpose of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
, providing knowledge, will
be blocked
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
then what is the benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
authority
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
say that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
Possible typo: you repeated a word
to to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
is done
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of improvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
facilities and to increase the staff members,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is a weak point,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whene
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
ratio is
being declined
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
what will become by the more facilities.
In conclusion
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that, the disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
charging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
outweigh the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
. Although there is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
authority to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'prise' is correct. If 'prise' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a prise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
overall
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disadvantages than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
.
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IELTS essay Many museums charge for admission while others are free. do you think that the advantages of charging people for admission to museum outweigh the disadvantages

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
219 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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