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Many museums charge for admission while others are free

Many museums charge for admission while others are free 6x6nG
Many people think that whatching television programmes are rather useless for children. I strongly agree with the idea that watching TV programmes are not useful for children. Now, On the one hand look at down sides some people think that television programmes are useful for children to improve their life. However, it is not the fact. Children's parents should control them if they are learning more valuable things. Because in their age their mind can catch a lot of things. Their minds are strong and fresh. In the age of from 9 to 18 they should learn more. If thet won't do this they could be drifter or poorer. On the other hand, watching TV programmes are helpful for children if they are lessons. If our television programmes show the good things to motivate children then children gravitate to a good side. If children waste their gold time on watching television programmes and playing games in the future they couldn't be a good person for their family and their mind still be like children's. And they might do not improve. If all around the world's children waste more time for reading books. They could be open-minded and they improve. To sums up watching TV programmes is not valuable just read books and sience competition. Then, children can achieve their goals in the future and their parents could appreciate their children.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
whatching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are
rather
useless for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that watching TV
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are not useful for children.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, On the one hand look at
Did you mean "downsides"?
down sides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are useful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their life.
However
, it is not the fact. Children's parents should control them if they are learning more valuable things.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
in their age their mind can catch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things. Their minds are strong and fresh. In the age of from 9 to 18 they should learn more. If
Possible spelling mistake found.
thet
Consider removing 'will'. (Usually, 'will' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless in the sense 'want to' or 'be willing to'.)
won't do
this they could be drifter or poorer.
On the other hand
, watching TV
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are helpful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
if they are lessons. If our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
things to motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
gravitate to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
side. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
waste their gold time on watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
and playing games in the future they couldn't be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
person for their family and their mind
still
be like children's. And they might do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
. If all around the world's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
waste more time for reading books. They could be open-minded and they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
.

To sums up watching TV
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
is not valuable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
read books and
Possible spelling mistake found.
sience
competition. Then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can achieve their goals in the future and their parents could appreciate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS essay Many museums charge for admission while others are free

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
230 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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