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Some people say education is the only critical factor to the development of a country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say education is the only critical factor to the development of a country. with this statement? m1bAN
In the present days, many countries around the world are keeping a focus more on education since it is undeniable that education is the key to a country’s development. Unfortunately, some countries’ educational system organizations are not really good since in some countries, poor families cannot really afford a good education for their children because the educational welfare of the countries are not well organized or not enough for them. Anyway, it looks like some countries have realized the importance of education and improving it. We can look at India for the example of this case as they have proved that educational development can really develop the country since the country has changed from a poor region to a high potential area for IT knowledge. Another essential thing to focus is the affordability of the citizens in the country. It implies that the country should care more on extending the educational opportunity to all areas not just in the center of the country or the capital city. To sum up, it is very necessary that many Governments of less developed countries take the power of education seriously and offer it to a wide range of people. Spending money for education is the key to a new future effect on the economy and social life. Learning and Knowledge is Power and an investment in the near future and therefore it has to be an official task. In my point of view, education is really a crucial key for any kind of development, no matter just the country but it can truly change everything if everyone has a good education.
In the present days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
around the world are keeping a focus more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
since it is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the key to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
development. Unfortunately,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
system organizations are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
since in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, poor families cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
afford a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for their children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
welfare of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are not well organized or not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for them.

Anyway, it looks like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have realized the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and improving it. We can look at India for the example of this case as they have proved that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
development can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
develop the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
from a poor region to a high potential area for IT knowledge.

Another essential thing to focus is the affordability of the citizens in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. It implies that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should care more on extending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
opportunity to all areas not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
in the center of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
or the capital city.

To sum up, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
of less developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
take the power of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
seriously
and offer it to a wide range of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Spending money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the key to a new future effect on the economy and social life. Learning and Knowledge is Power and an investment in the near future and
therefore
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be an official task. In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
a crucial key for any kind of development, no matter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can
truly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
everything if everyone has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
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IELTS essay Some people say education is the only critical factor to the development of a country. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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