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Many manufactured food and drink…

Many manufactured food and drink… N3YJb
Obesity is a serious problem that several modern societies face nowadays. One of its main causes is the high level of sugar found in a variety of manufactured food and drink items. A relevant number of individuals claim that one possible solution would be to increase these products’ prices, so that customers would by them less. I tend to disagree with this view, as it does not tackle the main issue, which is the poor nutritional level of food. Firstly, making such products more expensive does not bring guaranties that their demand would decrease. One could argue that a higher taxation could fund health programs, but it seems to deal with the consequence rather than the cause. It is proved that sugary products are addictive, similar to alcohol and other drugs, so the aproach could also be similar. Likewise, a higher price would not alter the nutritional facts of the products, which would continue to be harmful. Work on the composition of food and drink could have a more positive impact on individuals’ health. Although companies insert artificial flavors to their products to attract more customers, a better advertising campaign could provide the same outcome. Such media strategy could not only affects selling figures, but also raise awareness regarding healthy nutrition. There are a variety of groups that work on a healthier way of life and consumerism, so allying with them and fostering healthy activities would have a more beneficial impact than only making the products cost more. To sum up, increasing sugary products’ prices does not seem to resolve the health problems that they cause. As an addictive substance, sugar would be better faced with more regulation over food composition and a marketing plan which enhances healthy habits, for instance.
Obesity is a serious problem that several modern societies face nowadays. One of its main causes is the high level of sugar found in a variety of manufactured food and drink items. A relevant number of individuals claim that one possible solution would be to increase these
products’
prices,
so
that customers would
by
them less. I tend to disagree with this view, as it does not tackle the main issue, which is the poor nutritional level of food.

Firstly
, making such
products
more expensive does not bring guaranties that their demand would decrease. One could argue that a higher taxation could fund health programs,
but
it seems to deal with the consequence
rather
than the cause. It
is proved
that sugary
products
are addictive, similar to alcohol and other drugs,
so
the
aproach
could
also
be similar.

Likewise
, a higher price would not alter the nutritional facts of the
products
, which would continue to be harmful. Work on the composition of food and drink could have a more
positive
impact on individuals’ health. Although
companies
insert artificial flavors to their
products
to attract more customers, a better advertising campaign could provide the same outcome.

Such media strategy could not
only
affects
selling figures,
but
also
raise awareness regarding healthy nutrition. There are a variety of groups that work on a healthier way of life and consumerism,
so
allying with them and fostering healthy activities would have a more beneficial impact than
only
making the
products
cost more.

To sum up, increasing sugary
products’
prices does not seem to resolve the health problems that they cause. As an addictive substance, sugar would be better faced with more regulation over food composition and a marketing plan which enhances healthy habits,
for instance
.
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IELTS essay Many manufactured food and drink…

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
291 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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