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Many jobs that used to be done by humans are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?

Many jobs that used to be done by humans are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages? lmLX
More often machines replace humans to do their jobs. There is no consensus in society is it a positive or negative development. Some of them say that robots are better than people because they are doing work faster and without mistakes. But, on the contrary, it is extent to unemployment. So, in my opinion, it is a bad trend. So I will try to prove to you that with examples of The Government of Ukraine report and professor Jan Danilov's research. The first reason why this development brings more disadvantages, is that many workers are losing their jobs because they are replaced by machines. For example, The report of Ukrainian Government said that more and more jobs that used to be done by humans are now being done by machines. For instance, for the last 5 years, the number of workers had decreased by 13 per cent. So this is the first reason why I think it is a bad trend. The second example of why this is negative development proved by professor Jan Danilov. In his research, he studied how people and machines doing the same job and he came to conclusions that pay workers are cheaper than buy machines for it. So this is another reason why replacing humans with technological devices is a bad tendency. In conclusion, I think it is a negative development when many jobs that used to be done by humans are now being done by machines. In my opinion, it is a negative trend and society should choose people instead of robots.
More
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often
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machines
replace
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humans
to do their
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jobs
. There is no consensus in society is it a
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positive
or
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negative
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development
.
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Some
of them say that robots are better than
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people
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because
they are doing work faster and without mistakes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
on the contrary
, it is extent to unemployment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my opinion, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
trend.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I will try to prove to you that with examples of The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
of Ukraine report and professor Jan
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Danilov
's research.

The
first
reason why this
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development
brings more disadvantages, is that
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many
workers are losing their
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jobs
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because
they
are replaced
by
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machines
.
For example
, The report of Ukrainian
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Government
said that more and more
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jobs
that
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used
to
be done
by
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humans
are
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now
being done
by
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machines
.
For instance
, for the last 5 years, the number of workers had decreased by 13 per cent.
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So
this is the
first
reason why I
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think
it is a
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bad
trend.

The second example of why this is
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negative
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development
proved by professor Jan
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Danilov
. In his research, he studied how
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people
and
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machines
doing the same
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
job and
he came to conclusions that pay workers are cheaper than
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buy
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machines
for it.
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So
this is another reason why replacing
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humans
with technological devices is a
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bad
tendency.

In conclusion
, I
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think
it is a
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negative
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development
when
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many
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jobs
that
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used
to
be done
by
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humans
are
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now
being done
by
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machines
. In my opinion, it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
trend and society should choose
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
instead
of robots.
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IELTS essay Many jobs that used to be done by humans are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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