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Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not he employers. Do you agree or disagree?

Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not he employers. N9xj
Today, in the pandemic situation, various kinds of job should work at home using the internet and technology to reduce the transmission of the Corona Virus. Some people argue that it can brings beneficial only for the labourer, while others believe that this situation gives benefits to both of employers and labourer. In this essay, I will discuss the merits of working at home for society. First and foremost, reduce industry budget for householding cost such as electricity, internet, foods, and, transportation, saving more money for company. This is because there are no facilities usage by workers in the industry building. For instance, Google made a policy for their labourer to do their jobs in their residential once in a week, as result their company saving $150, 000, 000 expenditure. Secondly, labourer spends more time with relatives, whereas they give good performance in their job. More and more time is able to keep in touch and make a healthy relationship with their family. To illusrate, work at home succesfully reduce devorce cases in Indonesia, which is from 2, 000, 000 to 200, 000 cases in 2020. Hence, the society feel happy and comfortable in this working condition. The companies lose their function to keep an eye on their workers in several jobs, whereas labourer jobs are better and quicker than before. Companies profit increase remarkably during this condition. To sum up, using the technology to work at home not only give advantages for the workers but also for the employes such as saving budget and more time for family. Therefore, the industries in all of countries should consider to give their laborer option to do their job in company builing or in their own residence.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, in the pandemic situation, various kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
should work at home using the internet and technology to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the transmission of the
The term "Coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona Virus
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that it can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "bring"
brings
beneficial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
labourer
, while others believe that this situation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
benefits to both of employers and
Possible spelling mistake found.
labourer
. In this essay, I will discuss the merits of working at home for society.

First
and foremost,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
industry budget for
Possible spelling mistake found.
householding
cost such as electricity, internet, foods, and, transportation, saving more money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are no
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "facilities'" or "facility's"?
facilities
usage by workers in the industry building.
For instance
, Google made a policy for their
Possible spelling mistake found.
labourer
to do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in their residential once in a week, as result their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
saving $150, 000, 000 expenditure.

Secondly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
labourer
spends more time with relatives, whereas they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
performance in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. More and more time is able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a healthy relationship with their family. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
illusrate
, work at home
Possible spelling mistake found.
succesfully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
Possible spelling mistake found.
devorce
cases in Indonesia, which is from 2, 000, 000 to 200, 000 cases in 2020.
Hence
, the society feel happy and comfortable in this working condition.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
lose their function to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
an eye on their workers in several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, whereas
Possible spelling mistake found.
labourer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are better and quicker than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Companies
profit increase
remarkably
during this condition.

To sum up, using the technology to work at home not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
advantages for the workers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for the
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "employs", the plural form of the noun 'employ'?
employes
such as saving budget and more time for family.
Therefore
, the industries in
Consider using "all countries" or "all of the countries".
all of countries
should consider to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
their laborer option to do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
Possible spelling mistake found.
builing
or in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
residence.
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IELTS essay Many employees may work at home with the modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not he employers.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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