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Many countries spend a lot of money on art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many countries spend a lot of money on art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. YllV
One of the most trend today’s world is art, that can be improve our live through different aspects, some countries give the priority of investment to this sector, while others argue that could be better if we shed light on health and education sector. This essay will analyzed the both side of the argument in detail. Art is increasingly popular these days, which many people found that are might be discover themselves through that. as well as art such as painting, dance, music, photography and drama could be dramatically improve the economic power of the countries. For example Paris is the most country that attracting visitors these days, due to fact that is diverse of their arts, furthermore Paris is likely to support their artists and that increased their economic value. Art could be a key role for power and prosperous country. On the contrary, many argue that investments have to give the priority to health and educational sectors that can be super beneficial for economic country and improve people lives more that arts. For instance, if we increased the budget for purchase medical device and raise and developing medical technology that has effect on the improve lives people, moreover will gain the reputation to being attractive destination for healthcare to tourists overseas. by contrast educational sector might be critical issue as long as enhancing educating people and increasing in numbers of universities could be effective factor will empower countries as educational destination. In conclusion, this essay argued the both side of the argument of investment of arts sector as compared to health and educational sectors. I believe that investment in education and health sector might be give future generations to live better.
One of the most trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
, that can be
Consider using the past participle "improved"?
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
aspects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
give the priority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
investment
to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, while others argue that could be better if we shed light on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
. This essay will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "analyze"
analyzed
the both side of the argument in detail.

Art is
increasingly
popular these days, which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
found that are might be
Consider using the past participle "discovered"?
discover
themselves through that.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
as
well as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
such as painting, dance, music, photography and drama could be
dramatically
Consider using a past participle here: "improved".
improve
the economic power of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For example
Paris is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
that attracting visitors these days, due to fact
that is
diverse of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
,
furthermore
Paris is likely to support their artists and that increased their economic value.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
could be a key role for power and prosperous country.

On the contrary
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
investments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
give the priority to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
that can be super beneficial for economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
lives
more that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
.
For instance
, if we increased the budget for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
medical device and raise and developing medical technology that has effect on the
The word 'improve' is not a noun. Did you mean "improvement"?
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
moreover
will gain the reputation to being attractive destination for healthcare to tourists overseas.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
contrast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
might be critical issue as long as enhancing educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and increasing in numbers of universities could be effective factor will empower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
destination.

In conclusion
, this essay argued the both side of the argument of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
investment
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
investment
in education and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
might be give future generations to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
better.
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IELTS essay Many countries spend a lot of money on art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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