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Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages? GejB
Many governments' effort to strengthen the quality of life of citizens through improving economic conditions of the country, associates with negative impact on social norms. This essay will argue that despite there being some loss of social values, the benifits of economic development and resultant better quality of life due to ability of spending money on social services, are far outweigh the minor drawbacks. Many countries promote tourism in order to earn foreign income and it leads to deterioration of social and cultural values. When governments try to attract more visitors from foreign countries, it can be impacted on traditional way of life. Traditional living patterns are often based on close-knit communities, shared resources and less competitive society. In this process of development; however, inhabitants of the countries have to adjust with different norms, which leads to competitive and money oriented society. For example, Sri Lanka was historically an agricultural country. However, with the introduction of free economic policy, many farmers moved to tourism sector in order to earn higher income. This phenomenon has brought many adverse social conditions. Therefore, I believe that with better planning countries can eradicate such negativities. Economic development may have significant benefits on societies that cannot be earned from preserving social norms. In other words, if a government is economically stable, it can provide it citizens a better education, modern health care facilities, better transport and many other services, which would have been otherwise impossible to achieve. For example, economically developed countries allocate more than 10 percent of their GDP on education, while poor countries allocate less than 5 percent. Consequently, in developed nations, people may have better education and in turn contribute to country’s progress, as well as they help preserving their social and cultural uniqueness. In conclusion, the benefits that a society receive from economic progress of the country far outweigh some disadvantages of social and cultural disturbances. Hence, it is recommended to working towards economic wellbeing while minimizing negative social impact.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
' effort to strengthen the quality of life of citizens through improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
conditions of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, associates with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
norms. This essay will argue that despite there being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
values, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifits
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
development and resultant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
quality of life due to ability of spending money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
services, are far outweigh the minor drawbacks.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
promote tourism in order to earn foreign income and it leads to deterioration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
and cultural values. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
try to attract more visitors from foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, it can
be impacted
on traditional way of life. Traditional living patterns are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
based on close-knit communities, shared resources and less competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. In this process of development;
however
, inhabitants of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
adjust with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
norms, which leads to competitive and money oriented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
For example
, Sri Lanka was
historically
an agricultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
However
, with the introduction of free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
policy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
farmers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to tourism sector in order to earn higher income. This phenomenon has brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
adverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
conditions.
Therefore
, I believe that with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
planning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can eradicate such negativities.

Economic development may have significant benefits on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
that cannot
be earned
from preserving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
norms.
In other words
, if a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is
economically
stable, it can provide it citizens a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
education, modern health care facilities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
transport and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other services, which would have been
otherwise
impossible to achieve.
For example
,
economically
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
allocate more than 10 percent of their GDP on education, while poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
allocate less than 5 percent.
Consequently
, in developed nations,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
education and in turn contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
progress,
as well
as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
The verb 'help' is used with an infinitive: "to preserve" or "preserve".
preserving
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
and cultural uniqueness.

In conclusion
, the benefits that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
receive from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
progress of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
far outweigh
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
and cultural disturbances.
Hence
, it
is recommended
to working towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economic
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
while minimizing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
impact.
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IELTS essay Many countries aim to improve their living standard by economic development, but some important social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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