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Living in a country where you have to speak in a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

Living in a country where you have to speak in a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. v. 4
Residing in a Nation where speaking in a foreign speech is unavoidable can be a major source of social Problems as well as practical issues. I strongly agree with the fact that having to speak in a foreign language can be discouraging and in addition, can give rise to inferiority complex. To start with, becoming a bilingual is not a day achievement, but rather a task that requires commitment and interest. Most people do not see reasons why they should show interest in learning how to speak and understand a foreign language when the energy it requires can obviously be channeled into something much more benefiting. Unexpectedly, one May be required to take up an unavoidable task, hence the psychological Problem. For example, research done under Human psychology 2013 has shown that 25% of immigrants suffering from psychological disorder are as a result of Depression arising from Lack of ability to communicate in the required foreign way of relating. In addition, communication becomes a Problem in public which can cause inferiority complex for such Person among is Friend. More so, if care is not taken, relating with peers can as well became a major issue to address as insecurity can Set in. For instance, a man who can hardly express himself will neither not contribute nor communicate in a senseless manner. In conclusion. I strongly agree that relocating to a Land in which a New means of communication is required can be exhausting to the extent of causing social and practical Problems.
Residing in a Nation where speaking in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
speech is unavoidable can be a major source of social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Problems
as well
as practical issues. I
strongly
Consider using "agree that".
agree with the fact that
having to speak in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
language can be discouraging and
in addition
, can give rise to inferiority complex.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, becoming a bilingual is not a day achievement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
rather
a task that requires commitment and interest. Most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
reasons why they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interest in learning how to speak and understand a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
language when the energy it requires can
obviously
be channeled
into something much more benefiting.
Unexpectedly
, one May
be required
to take up an unavoidable task,
hence
the psychological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Problem
.
For example
, research done under Human psychology 2013 has shown that 25% of immigrants suffering from psychological disorder are
as a result
of Depression arising from Lack of ability to communicate in the required
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
way of relating.

In addition
, communication becomes a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Problem
in public which can cause inferiority complex for such Person among is Friend. More
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, if care is not taken, relating with peers can
as well
became a major issue to address as insecurity can Set in.
For instance
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
who can hardly express himself will neither not contribute nor communicate
Consider replacing "in a senseless manner" with the adverb for "senseless"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a senseless manner
.

In conclusion
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that relocating to a Land in which a New means of communication
is required
can be exhausting to the extent of causing social and practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Problems
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Living in a country where you have to speak in a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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