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Lifestyles and culture in many countries is becoming similar, why is it so? is it positive or negative?

Lifestyles and culture in many countries is becoming similar, why is it so? is it positive or negative? yRmn3
Nowadays, we lives in developed country so use of advance technology and due to globalization lifestyles and culture of various have become identical. There are several reason for this similarities. from my perspective i believe that this trend has both positive and negative for each country. There are many factors for such similarities. first and main reason is globalization there are many people travel to other countries because it is expanded your business or also improve market competition. Secondly, some multi national companies have started to manufacture some products across the countries. Finally, some satellite television company is easily adopt lifestyle and culture of the countries because it is promoting more revenue, however such development looks good apparently. On the one hand, I will give some reason for the benefits of the countries which are more similar to other countries than before. Firstly, it can build the strong relationship between people over the world. For instance, if two businessman coming from different countries so it could be eastly managed to communication, share their ideas also thinking power will be same. Secondly, sometimes some people travel or migrate to other countries. it is also benefits for their people because they are eastly settle their and start to make bright future. For instance, one of my friend was going to Canada before covid pandemic so he was faced many difficulty to settle their if lifestyle and culture same so i think he will set easily. On the other hand, there are various drawbacks of this similarities to begin with globalization, similarity is makes the world looks like the virtual community. because loss of culture of countries and also diversity of countries In addition young generation loss to your own cultures for instance Indian club is recently organized one survey regarding countries in this survey more and more Indian people adopted to the western culture, in terms of living style, western clothes. In conclusion, I suppose that cultures similarity in many countries will bring both negative and positive effects for their areas.
Nowadays, we
The pronoun 'we' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "live"
lives
in developed
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country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of advance technology and due to globalization lifestyles and
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culture
of various have become identical. There are
Possible agreement error. The noun reason seems to be countable; consider using: "several reasons".
several reason
for
Did you mean "these"?
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similarities
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
from
my perspective
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that this trend has both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
for each country.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors for such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similarities
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
first
and main reason is globalization there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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people
travel to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
is expanded
your business or
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
market competition.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This word is normally spelled as one.
multi national
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companies
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to manufacture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
products across the
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countries
.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
satellite television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is
easily
adopt lifestyle and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is promoting more revenue,
however
such development looks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
apparently
.

On the one hand, I will give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reason for the benefits of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which are more similar to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
Firstly
, it can build the strong relationship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
over the world.
For instance
, if two
Possible agreement error. The noun 'businessman' seems to be countable, so consider using: "businessmen".
businessman
coming from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it could be
Possible spelling mistake found.
eastly
managed to communication, share their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
also
thinking power will be same.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travel or migrate to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is
also
benefits for their
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people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
Possible spelling mistake found.
eastly
settle their and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
bright future.
For instance
, one of my friend was going to Canada
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
pandemic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he
was faced
Possible agreement error. The noun difficulty seems to be countable; consider using: "many difficulties".
many difficulty
to settle their if lifestyle and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
same
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
he will set
easily
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are various drawbacks of
Did you mean "these"?
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similarities
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with globalization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similarity
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the world looks like the virtual community.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and
also
diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
In addition
young generation loss to your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
for instance
Indian club is recently organized one survey regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in this survey more and more Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
adopted to the western
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, in terms of living style, western clothes.

In conclusion
, I suppose that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similarity
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will bring both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects for their areas.
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IELTS essay Lifestyles and culture in many countries is becoming similar, why is it so? is it positive or negative?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
339 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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