Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

LIFE ON CAMPUS HAS CERTAIN INFLUENCE ON STUDENTS' LIVES AND THEIR PERFORMANCE. Do you agree or disagree ?

For some college students to live far away from home or living with families both of them have many opportunities and disadvantages. Some people say although living with parents has several benefits, this lifestyle has a number of negative aspects. Others tell they manage their personal finance on their own gradually developing certain skills necessary for their future life. The following part of this essay describes the both of positive sides and drawbacks of living on campus or at home. To begin with, while living away from their colleges, some students will be deprived of attending various extracurricular sports and recreational activities. In addition, the reason is that not all of them would be able to travel some distance to and from their colleges for various reasons such as bad weather, household chores or financial considerations. As a consequences, this will deprive students of developing their teamwork and communication skills. A very good example is students cannot learn like campus students and they would spend more time searching a book. However, with the absence of parental care, students will have to shoulder all troubles of life. On top of that, students might learn how to live and work in harmony with others. The best example is that they also have a good opportunity to make friends with other students and develop lasting friendship with them. Students who live on campus have all the necessary conditions to study and improve their knowledge. To sum up, based on these comparisons, I would like to say that living on campus far away from home seems to be a good idea than living at the same home with parents.
For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far away from home or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with families both of them have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opportunities and disadvantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
with parents has several benefits, this lifestyle has a number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects. Others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
they manage their personal finance on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
gradually
developing certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
necessary for their future life. The following part of this essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
the both of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides and drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campus
or at home.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
away from their colleges,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will
be deprived
of attending various extracurricular sports and recreational activities.
In addition
, the reason is that not all of them would be able to travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
distance to and from their colleges for various reasons such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
weather, household chores or financial considerations. As
The plural noun “consequences” cannot be used with the article “a”. Did you mean “a consequence” or “consequences”?
a consequences
, this will deprive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of developing their teamwork and communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. A
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
cannot learn like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campus
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
students and
they would spend more time searching a book.

However
, with the absence of parental care,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
shoulder all troubles of life.
On top of that
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
might learn how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and work in harmony with others. The best example is that they
also
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
friends with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and develop lasting friendship with them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campus
have all the necessary conditions to study and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their knowledge.

To sum up, based on these comparisons, I would like to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
campus
far away from home seems to be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
at the same home with parents.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay LIFE ON CAMPUS HAS CERTAIN INFLUENCE ON STUDENTS' LIVES AND THEIR PERFORMANCE.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts