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Leadership can be demonstrated in many ways. Please share how you have demonstrated leadership in either your school, job, community, and/or within your family responsibilities. Please limit your response to 250-300 words.

Leadership can be demonstrated in many ways. Please share how you have demonstrated leadership in either your school, job, community, and/or within your family responsibilities. Please limit your response to 250-300 words. KwVD0
For me, being a leader doesn't always mean standing at the front of the room or imposing your will on another, I'm not a typical leader per say like I wasn’t a captain of a sports team or I've never found a club or organization, but I've shown a lot of my leadership at home and outside school. I used to help my grandparents when they are sick, I used to cook food, do the chores without even asking and get them necessity items like medicines and all. I even worked at an orphanage for the last 2 summers of my high school and the first 2 summers I used to play cricket for Intramurals at school. Me and my cousin sister used to work in an orphanage, well not mostly work there, but we used to supply the orphanage every month with food supplies and other necessary commodities. We also helped kids get the necessary health care and studies. We used to go one Sunday every month to see how the kids are and how they are with their studies. Kids used to get excited by our visit and we used to be equally excited visiting them, those Sundays were the best and happiest days were some of the happiest days of my life. I will continue serving as a leader in college. You only get one shot at college, and I want to have meaningful experiences helping the needy. I am excited to work alongside like-minded, driven, service-oriented Longhorns. I also look forward to joining service groups and work in community services.
For me, being a leader doesn't always mean standing at the front of the room or imposing your will on another, I'm not a typical leader
Did you mean "per se" (=by itself, by themselves)?
per say
like I wasn’t a captain of a sports team or I've never found a club or organization,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I've shown
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
my leadership at home and outside school.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
my grandparents when they are sick, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to cook food, do the chores without even asking and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them necessity items like medicines and all. I even worked at an orphanage for the last 2 summers of my high school and the
first
2 summers I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to play cricket for
Possible spelling mistake found.
Intramurals at
school.
When referring to yourself and somebody else, put their name first. Also check whether the nominative form "I" is required here.
Me
and my cousin sister
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in an orphanage, well not
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
there,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to supply the orphanage every month with food supplies and other necessary commodities. We
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the necessary health care and studies. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to go one Sunday every month to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
how the kids are and how they are with their studies. Kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
excited by our
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
visit and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be
equally
excited visiting them,
The verb 'Sundays' is singular. Did you mean: "This Sundays" or "those Sunday"?
those Sundays
were the best and happiest days were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of the happiest days of my life.

I will continue serving as a leader in college. You
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
one shot at college, and I want to have meaningful experiences helping the needy. I
am excited
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
alongside like-minded, driven, service-oriented Longhorns. I
also
look forward to joining service groups and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in community services.

IELTS essay Leadership can be demonstrated in many ways. Please share how you have demonstrated leadership in either your school, job, community, and/or within your family responsibilities. Please limit your response to 250-300 words.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
264 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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