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land use for human needs or for endangered animals

land use for human needs or for endangered animals m1Dyn
Land is a limited resource on earth. People have been in arguments that land should be given to satisfy human needs for housing, farmland and industry instead of keeping for endangered species. I personally disagree with the idea that land should be kept to humans rather than endangered species. endangered species are habitants of earth, which they deserve to use the land they need for survival. I feel this for a few reasons, which I will be explaining in the following essay. First of all, endangered species, although with their small number, are still an important member of the ecosystem. Taking land away from them will lead them into extinction. Their extinction will affect the whole chain of the ecosystem and will then affect other animals. An extinction in seals may cause a major disruption in the ecosystem in Antartic and as well as the nearby ecosystems. Secondly, endangered species are precious resources for scientific research. It is important to ensure their survival so that we get enough information about them and that will enable us to have a better understanding of our earth. By studying these animals such as polar bears, we will have a better understanding of the conditions in the North pole and this will provide us of a better vision of the earth as a whole. In conclusion, I am to the opinion of land should be kept for endangered species rather than for human needs because endangered species are important to sustain a balance in the ecosystem and because they can provide valuable information about earth.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Land
is a limited resource on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have been in arguments that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to satisfy human needs for housing, farmland and industry
instead
of keeping for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species. I
personally
disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
to humans
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
endangered
species are habitants of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
, which they deserve to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
they need for survival. I feel this for a few reasons, which I will be explaining in the following essay.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species, although with their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number, are
still
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
member of the ecosystem. Taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
away from them will lead them into extinction. Their extinction will affect the whole chain of the ecosystem and will then affect other animals. An extinction in seals may cause a major disruption in the ecosystem in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Antartic
and
as well
as the nearby ecosystems.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species are precious resources for scientific research. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to ensure their survival
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
information about them and that will enable us to have a better understanding of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
. By studying these animals such as polar bears, we will have a better understanding of the conditions in the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
North pole
and this will provide us of a better vision of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
as a whole.

In conclusion
, I am to the opinion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species
rather
than for human needs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
endangered
species are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to sustain a balance in the ecosystem and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can provide valuable information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
.
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IELTS essay land use for human needs or for endangered animals

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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