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Kids are the reflection of the adult’s belief. I am totally agree on this statement. This essay will show off the reason for

Kids are the reflection of the adult’s belief. I am totally agree on this statement. This essay will show off the reason for LLK2p
Kids are the reflection of the adult’s belief. I am totally agree on this statement. This essay will show off the reason for agreement. First of all, children are depended on grown-ups. Not until the age of eighteen, do kids depend on their parents. That is why parents’ belief and encouragement are very important to them. If there is enough love, care, and courage to the child to follow their dream, most of them will bloom and become talented. This is shown by Thomas Edison when he was a little boy. Despite the rejection of all primary schools at that time, his mother was able to teach and allow him to follow his dreams to become an inventor. On the other hand, the child always being heard and yelled at is unlikely to be successful. They will be pessimistic on their ability to make the dream come true. Some children have to live up to their mother or father’s hopes and not their beliefs or hobbies. Second up, children are the reflection of education. When a child goes to school, teachers are their guidance. In some cases, they are the pupils’ friends, sisters or brothers. So that, what they believe in them is very crucial. When one teacher shows up their belief and encourages on the student’s ability, he or she will feel energetic and power to show off and pursuit dream. Sometimes, the teacher is the person being by their side on their route to success. This is the case of Albert Einstein, the most famous physician in the 20thcentury. On the contrary, it can lead the talented to hell and never have chances to bloom. In the conclusion, what grown-ups think and believe is very important to children. That is one of the crucial keys to successful and happy adult in the future.
Kids are the reflection of the adult’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
belief
. I am
totally
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
on this statement. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off the reason for agreement.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are depended
on grown-ups. Not until the age of eighteen, do kids depend on their parents.
That is
why parents’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
belief
and encouragement are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to them. If there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, care, and courage to the child to follow their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dream
, most of them will bloom and become talented. This
is shown
by Thomas Edison when he was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
boy. Despite the rejection of all primary schools at that time, his mother was able to teach and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
him to follow his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dreams
to become an inventor.
On the other hand
, the child always
being heard
and yelled at is unlikely to be successful. They will be pessimistic on their ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dream
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
true.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
up to their mother or father’s hopes and not their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
or hobbies.

Second up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are the reflection of education. When a child goes to school, teachers are their guidance. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, they are the pupils’ friends, sisters or brothers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that, what they believe in them is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
crucial. When one teacher
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
up their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
belief
and encourages on the student’s ability, he or she will feel energetic and power to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off and pursuit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dream
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, the teacher is the person being by their side on their route to success. This is the case of Albert Einstein, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
physician in the 20thcentury.
On the contrary
, it can lead the talented to hell and never have chances to bloom.

In the conclusion, what grown-ups
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and believe is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
That is
one of the crucial keys to successful and happy adult in the future.
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IELTS essay Kids are the reflection of the adult’s belief. I am totally agree on this statement. This essay will show off the reason for

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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