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It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30

It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30 pRaYy
In recent years, marriage has attracted lots of different meanings. To some, it is perceived as a beautiful thing and religiously acceptable while to others, it is not a parameter to a perfect life considering the diverse challenges it poses. To determine whether it should be encouraged before a person attains the age of 30 might be misleading because it appears to me like the two sides of coin. In my view, i would like to enumerate the followings: First, just like our world view is different; marriage should not be a yardstick to measure the quality of life nor accomplishments. To some, it could be a must but for others, it means nothing. While those who belong to the early marriage school of thoughts might embrace it solely due to having children early and raising them quickly others might opt for adoption without being married. Consequently, marital vow comes with its own challenges which partners often find rocky but tend to cope with. On the other hand, these challenges could be escaped if one is not in any marital contract. It is pertinent to note, there are individual differences when it comes to life choices and these serve as scale as to which decision weighs better and stronger. In life, there are two sides to everything such as benefits or drawbacks. Thus, this sheds the light on the likelihood of marital commitment's success or failure. Furthermore, it is crucial to point that not everyone wants to be married because people have goals to be accomplished. For some, it could follow no particular as long as it is achieved but for others, it must follow a sequential arrangement depending where marriage falls on the list. In a little while, with the variations in modern marriages; one could wonder if it is worth it. As far as i am concerned, early marriage in conjuction with education is great as this should go hand-in-hand but in situations whereby, there is no education nor an employment, it could be somewhat difficult to scale through. In conclusion, it is important to note that societal values tend to shape us into what a perfect life looks like but one must consider the comfortability with these values to know if it amazing for us or not. Marriage is a beautiful thing but it should be done when a person is well equiped socially, mentally, physically, financially capable. I do not agree with the notion that marriage before age 30 is the best. It
In recent years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
has attracted lots of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
meanings. To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, it
is perceived
as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
thing and
religiously
acceptable while to others, it is not a parameter to a perfect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
considering the diverse challenges it poses. To determine whether it should
be encouraged
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
a person attains the age of 30 might be misleading
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it appears to me like the two sides of coin.

In my view,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to enumerate the followings:

First
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like our world view is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
should not be a yardstick to measure the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
nor accomplishments. To
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, it could be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for others, it means nothing. While those who belong to the early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
school of thoughts might embrace it
solely
due to having children early and raising them
quickly
others might opt for adoption without
being married
.

Consequently
, marital vow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
challenges which partners
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
find rocky
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
tend to cope with. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, these challenges could
be escaped
if one is not in any marital contract.

It is pertinent to note, there are individual differences when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
choices and these serve as scale as to which decision weighs better and stronger. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, there are two sides to everything such as benefits or drawbacks.
Thus
, this sheds the light on the likelihood of marital commitment's success or failure.

Furthermore
, it is crucial to point that not everyone wants to
be married
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have goals to
be accomplished
. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, it could follow no particular as long as it
is achieved
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for others, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
follow a sequential arrangement depending where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
falls on the list.

In a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
while, with the variations in modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriages
; one could wonder if it is worth it. As far as
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am concerned
, early
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
conjuction
with education is great as this should go hand-in-hand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in situations whereby, there is no education nor an employment, it could be somewhat difficult to scale through.

In conclusion
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to note that societal values tend to shape us into what a perfect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
looks like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
consider the
Possible spelling mistake found.
comfortability
with these values to know if
Did you mean "it's amazing", "it is amazing", or "it was amazing"?
it amazing
for us or not.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Marriage
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should
be done
when a person is well
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "equipped", the past tense form of the verb 'equip'?
equiped
socially
, mentally,
physically
,
financially
capable. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
age 30 is the best. It
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IELTS essay It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30

Essay
  American English
8 paragraphs
416 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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