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It is said that young people should visit other countries as it is beneficial for their development. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is said that young people should visit other countries as it is beneficial for their development. wOdkl
Nowadays, Youngsters want to quickly connect to new technologies and new culture of other country. There are many chances to develop themselves. Some student goes for further study in foreign country and some youngsters go for travelling foreign country to increase their knowledge. I totally agree with that young people should visit other countries and it is very helpful for their development. In current scenario, It become trend to do further study in foreign countries. The important thing is that some countries such as Canada, USA, UK and more are provided scholarship on different types of courses for International students. Specially, Germany gives free education to their students as well as international students. That's why students are attract towards other countries. Today's youth like to move in other countries because there are so many latest technology developed. Therefore, they can learn latest thing and can develop their strong career and also get their dream job. So, I agree with my choice. Some countries also sponsor free tour ship to other countries ‘students. They organize trip and choose some student from numerous university. They can choose students on their bright result and also can select students which have good skill and knowledge about the related field of them. During visit other country, Student can understand about their culture, education, foods, animals, weather, historical places and modern cafe, malls, famous markets and more. This is the best way for the young people to develop themselves. In this modern era, people have strong network. Some people get information about the other countries through the network. It is not enough for themselves. Some students leave their dream to visit other countries due to financial situation. And some have money to travel other countries but they do not like to go. The young people should visit their countries personally. To pen down, I would to say that visit other countries it is become memorable moment. Sometimes, It is play main role in young people's life. Youngsters can learn lots of thing and also can learn how to behave with other people. All these become beneficial for developing their career and life.
Nowadays, Youngsters want to
quickly
connect to new technologies and new culture of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
chances to develop themselves.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
goes for
further
study in foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
youngsters go for travelling foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to increase their knowledge. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful for their development.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
scenario, It
Did you mean "becomes"?
become
trend to do
further
study in foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
such as Canada, USA, UK and more
are provided
scholarship on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of courses for International
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Specially
, Germany gives free education to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
as well
as international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. That's why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
Consider using a past participle here: "attracted".
attract
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
's youth like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
latest technology developed.
Therefore
, they can learn
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
thing and can develop their strong career and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their dream job.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with my choice.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
also
sponsor free tour ship to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
‘students
. They organize trip and choose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
from numerous university. They can choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
on their bright result and
also
can select
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
which have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
and knowledge about the related field of them. During
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
can understand about their culture, education, foods, animals, weather, historical places and modern
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
, malls,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
markets and more. This is the best way for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to develop themselves.

In this modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have strong network.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
through the network. It is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for themselves.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their dream to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
due to financial situation. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
have money to travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they do not like to go. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
personally
.

To pen down, I would to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
it
is become
memorable moment.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, It is play main role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's life. Youngsters can learn
Possible agreement error. The noun thing seems to be countable; consider using: "lots of things".
lots of thing
and
also
can learn how to behave with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. All these become beneficial for developing their career and life.
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IELTS essay It is said that young people should visit other countries as it is beneficial for their development.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
356 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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