Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is said that children should do voluntary work in their leisure time which contributes to the community

It is said that children should do voluntary work in their leisure time which contributes to the community XoVD8
It is said that children should do voluntary work in their leisure time which contributes to the community. I wholeheartedly agree with the viewpoint that all teenagers should be encouraged to do volunteer work which gains them tremendous benefits to themselves and for the entire society. The first reason is that doing volunteer work stimulates children's empathy, sharing and thoughtfulness for other people. Parents in the US, for instance, taught their children doing charity from an early age by sharing their old toys, clothes for other people who could not afford to buy them. These actions guide students to be sympathetic for others and sharing from the small things, and learn to respect irrespective of the level of position they were in. The second viewpoint is that doing charity works that increase students' contribution to society which help them to become better citizen of the community. Thus, children will gain a good insight into helping and sharing with others. For example, children will have a tendency to donate their books, materials when the school or the volunteer group calls for it, and do not hesitate for doing it because they might think that helping other people will help them to live a better life instead of giving for the useless stuff that individual do not need. To conclude, I extremely agree with the perspective that children should do unpaid volunteer work due to gaining various benefits. It is likely that parents should make good sample for children by helping other disability people, the homeless and encourage children to engage in this situation that students will follow the actions that their parents did.
It
is said
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should do voluntary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their leisure time which contributes to the community. I
wholeheartedly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the viewpoint that all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
should
be encouraged
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
which gains them tremendous benefits to themselves and for the entire society.

The
first
reason is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
stimulates children's empathy,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
and thoughtfulness for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Parents in the US,
for instance
, taught their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
charity from an early age by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
toys, clothes for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who could not afford to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
them. These actions guide students to be sympathetic for others and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
things, and learn to respect irrespective of the level of position they were in.

The second viewpoint is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
charity works that increase students' contribution to society which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to become better citizen of the community.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will gain a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
insight into helping and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
with others.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will have a tendency to donate their books, materials when the school or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
group calls for it, and do not hesitate for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a better life
instead
of giving for the useless stuff
The verb 'do' is plural. Did you mean: "that individual does"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
that individual do
not need.

To conclude
, I
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the perspective that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should do unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
due to gaining various benefits. It is likely that parents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
sample for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
disability
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the homeless and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to engage in this situation that students will follow the actions that their parents did.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay It is said that children should do voluntary work in their leisure time which contributes to the community

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • It is said that children should do voluntary work in their leisure time which contributes to the community