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It is often thought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media . What are the causes and solution

It is often thought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media. What are the causes and solution 7JMaY
There is an iota of doubt that juvenile deliquencyis beciminga great deal of concern nowadays. Media plays a key role in children crime. There are some reasons behind this issue. I believe that there are several pragmatic approaches can be capitalized to tackle this issue. There are two primary causeswhy the rate of crime is higher. The first prominant justificationis that both parents are working. They have no time to spend with their kids. To explain it, parents does not pay attention on their kids that what their children are doing. Owing to this, adolecent are indulging into violance. Secondly, internet is flouring by leaps and bounds. To eleborate it, paying attention on violence movies and stealen peogrammes children are adopting tgese type of activities in their life. Thus, they are becoming criminal after growing up. Nevertheless, there are still workable solutions to address this condition. Firstly, policy maker should reduce the working hours of parents. Explaining it, parents will be free time to access their children. They could spend free time for taking care of children. Secondly, government should take strict action regarding information which is represented on social media by celebrities ad government shoukd ban those films which shows more violence and crime. As a result, crime rate will be decreased. In conclusion, although it has some cause which effect detrimentak development of children, some feasible steps could be taken to mitigate this problem. By educating youngones, government could decrease the rate of young crime.
There is an iota of doubt that juvenile
Possible spelling mistake found.
deliquencyis
Possible spelling mistake found.
beciminga
great deal of concern nowadays. Media plays a key role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons behind this issue. I believe that there are several pragmatic approaches can
be capitalized
to tackle this issue. There are two primary
Possible spelling mistake found.
causeswhy
the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is higher. The
first
Possible spelling mistake found.
prominant
Possible spelling mistake found.
justificationis
that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are working. They have no time to spend with their kids. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
does not pay attention on their kids that what their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are doing. Owing to this,
Possible spelling mistake found.
adolecent
are indulging into
Possible spelling mistake found.
violance
.
Secondly
, internet is flouring by leaps and bounds. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
eleborate
it, paying attention on violence movies and
Possible spelling mistake found.
stealen
Possible spelling mistake found.
peogrammes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are adopting
Possible spelling mistake found.
tgese
type of activities in their life.
Thus
, they are becoming criminal after growing up.
Nevertheless
, there are
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
workable
solutions to address this condition.
Firstly
,
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
policy maker
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the working hours of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. Explaining it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
will be free time to access their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They could spend free time for taking care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take strict action regarding information which
is represented
on social media by
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "celebrities'" or "celebrity's"?
celebrities
ad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoukd
ban those films which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
more violence and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate will
be decreased
.
In conclusion
, although it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cause which effect
Possible spelling mistake found.
detrimentak
development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
feasible steps could
be taken
to mitigate this problem. By educating
Possible spelling mistake found.
youngones
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could decrease the rate of young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
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IELTS essay It is often thought that the increase in juvenile crime can be attributed to violence in the media. What are the causes and solution

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
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Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
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  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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