Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is often argued that university students ought to study whatever they like but some people opine that education systems should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future

It is often argued that university students ought to study whatever they like but some people opine that education systems should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future PEADK
It is often argued that university students ought to study whatever they like but some people opine that education systems should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as science and technology related subjects. I am partially agreeing with this decision, in following paragraphs I would discuss my viewpoints with supporting examples. We cannot deny that the role of science and technology are increased day by day, if students who pursue their study related to these topics then success ratio of these students will be increased and they are able secure their job in these fields quickly. For example, according to one of the survey report of Times of India, there are 50% more chances to find the job in science and technology sector as compared to other sectors. However, we cannot ignore the other subjects such as history or language, because by studying these subjects we are able to know about our traditions, cultures and sacrifices done by our ancestors to save our country or society, if we completely ignore or ban these subjects then in upcoming 4 or 5 decades, people forget their traditions and cultures. In addition, if students have not freedom to choose their own interest of subjects then these students cannot perform very well even those subjects are in high demands. For instance, according to students wellbeing organization, approximately 15% students are failed in exams because they do not have interest in their subjects. To conclude, nowadays science and technology have great job opportunities and these are vital for our future but we cannot neglect the other subjects, these subject also play crucial role in our societies.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
ought to study whatever they like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that education systems should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that will be useful in the future, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. I am
partially
agreeing with this decision, in following paragraphs I would discuss my viewpoints with supporting examples.

We cannot deny that the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are increased
day by day, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who pursue their study related to these topics then success ratio of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
increased and
they are
The preposition 'to' is required in front of the verb 'secure'.
able secure
their job in these fields
quickly
.
For example
, according to one of the survey report of Times of India, there are 50% more chances to find the job in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
sector as compared to other sectors.

However
, we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as history or language,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
by studying these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
we are able to know about our traditions, cultures and sacrifices done by our ancestors to save our country or society, if we completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
or ban these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
then in upcoming 4 or 5 decades,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
forget their traditions and cultures.
In addition
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have not freedom to choose their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interest of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
then these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
cannot perform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well even those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are in high demands.
For instance
, according to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
organization, approximately 15%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are failed
in exams
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not have interest in their subjects.

To conclude
, nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
have great job opportunities and these are vital for our future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we cannot neglect the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
also
play crucial role in our societies.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay It is often argued that university students ought to study whatever they like but some people opine that education systems should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts