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It is now possible for tourist and scientist to remote natural environment, such as the south pole, What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience

It is now possible for tourist and scientist to remote natural environment, such as the south pole, What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience qmRw
Visiting distant natural places for example the South pole which was once considered unreachable has now became possible for wanderer and the scientist to reach there. In my opinion, I believe that there are advantages in reaching undiscoverable or untouched places can help us to calm down our curiosity to find out what resides in that which can help us to create the new greater invention for tomorrow. To commence with the advantages, reaching to these kind of remote place can help scientist to do their experiments which require quite a low temperature. For instance, due to the cold and chilly windy weather experimenters are able preserve things which are believed to lasts decades. In addition to that, these undiscoverable places can help to explore and find new flora and fauna which were at first not know. Moreover, these kinds of discoveries may help scientist to find the answers which were unanswered. On the other hand, it is the human tendency to disrupt the environment as per our needs. In a similar manner, if more and more tourist will visit these kind of untouched places which can harm the beauty as we as human being tend to litter around anywhere without thinking how harmful can be it for the environment. Also, due to the frequent visit pollution can increase which can melt the snow at the South Pole which can act as a booster to the melting of ice which is already taking place due to global warming. In conclusion, it can be derived human interferences with the nature can be devastating at time and has many disadvantages. However, with the advancement with the technology reaching to distant places has had helped to invent new things and to do research which can be used for the betterment of the people on the earth
Visiting distant natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
for example
the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
South pole
which was once considered unreachable has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
Use the past participle "become" after the modal (auxiliary) verb 'has'.
became
possible for wanderer and the scientist to reach there. In my opinion, I believe that there are advantages in reaching
Possible spelling mistake found.
undiscoverable
or untouched
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us to calm down our curiosity to find out what resides in that which can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us to create the new greater invention for tomorrow.

To commence with the advantages, reaching to
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
scientist to do their experiments which require quite a low temperature.
For instance
, due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
and chilly windy weather experimenters are
The preposition 'to' is required in front of the verb 'preserve'.
able preserve
things which
are believed
to
The verb after "to" should be in the base form: "last".
lasts
decades.
In addition
to that, these
Possible spelling mistake found.
undiscoverable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to explore and find new flora and fauna which were at
first
not know.
Moreover
, these kinds of discoveries may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
scientist to find the answers which
were unanswered
.

On the other hand
, it is the human tendency to disrupt the environment as per our needs.
Consider replacing "In a similar manner" with the adverb for "similar"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
In a similar manner
, if more and more tourist will visit
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of untouched
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
which can harm the beauty as we as human being tend to litter around anywhere without thinking how harmful can be it for the environment.
Also
, due to the frequent visit pollution can increase which can melt the snow at the South Pole which can act as a booster to the melting of ice which is already taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
due to global warming.

In conclusion
, it can
be derived
human interferences with the nature can be devastating at time and has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disadvantages.
However
, with the advancement with the technology reaching to distant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
has had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to invent new things and to do research which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the betterment of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
on the earth
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IELTS essay It is now possible for tourist and scientist to remote natural environment, such as the south pole, What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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