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it is important to exteneded our families

it is important to exteneded our families O61N7
Our life has changed a lot in the way we enlarge or shorten our family's memebers. As far as i am concerned, it critically important that we aim to extended our family. There are two reasons why i feel this way, which i will explore in the following essay. To begin with, in our live we go through abundance of difficulties and in sometimes we need assist with this. what i means is that our live exposed to many challanges in todays world. Therefore, being srrounded by a group of people is become easy to went through problems. My personal experience is a compelling illustration of what i mean. Two years go, i have worked in a company with adequate salary for living and enough for afford necessary objects, but infrtuanatly my company run out of business and i could not able to find a job. Consequntly, My family is a big and most of them were working in many firms and in a various jobs. AS a result of this, i was able to work with and choise what is sutiable for me since they work in a plothora of a mumber of companies. Furthermore, Many people in presnt-day begin to travel a lot to different conuntries but the problem, it was hard to find someone to guide and spent the time in there house, but all that become readily if a person has a member of his family in that city that he is going to travel. For instance, Five months ago, i have travel to Istanbul and the amazing things we easily find place with out any setback. Moreover, we spent a wounderful time with out spending a lot of many for a commedition since we stay at my uncle apartment. If a person has a extended familu, he will definitely have a great time.
Our life has
changed
a lot in the way we enlarge or shorten our family's
memebers
. As far as
i
am concerned
, it
critically
important
that we aim to extended our family. There are two reasons why
i
feel this way, which
i
will explore in the following essay.

To
begin
with, in our
live
we go through abundance of difficulties and in
sometimes
we need assist with this.
what
i
means is that our
live
exposed to
many
challanges
in
todays
world.
Therefore
, being
srrounded
by a group of
people
is become
easy to went through problems. My personal experience is a compelling illustration of what
i
mean. Two years go,
i
have worked in a
company
with adequate salary for living and
enough
for afford necessary objects,
but
infrtuanatly
my
company
run out of business and
i
could not able to find a job.
Consequntly
, My family is a
big
and most of them were working in
many
firms and in a various
jobs
.
AS a result
of this,
i
was able to work with and
choise
what is
sutiable
for me since they work in a
plothora
of a
mumber
of
companies
.

Furthermore
,
Many
people
in
presnt-day
begin
to travel a lot to
different
conuntries
but
the problem, it was
hard
to find someone to guide and spent the time in
there
house
,
but
all that become
readily
if a person has a member of his family in that city that he is going to travel.
For instance
, Five months ago,
i
have travel to Istanbul and the amazing things we
easily
find place
with out
any setback.
Moreover
, we spent a
wounderful
time
with out
spending
a lot of
many
for a
commedition
since we stay at my uncle apartment. If a person has
a
extended
familu
, he will definitely have a great time.
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IELTS essay it is important to exteneded our families

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
308 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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