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It is commonly thought that last modes of technology to entertain at home such as smart TVs, high speed networking and soft tablets are getting a harmful impact on individuals" life in particular youngsters. This is some ideas that I am partly disagree with

It is commonly thought that last modes of technology to entertain at home such as smart TVs, high speed networking and soft tablets are getting a harmful impact on individuals" life in particular youngsters. This is some ideas that I am partly disagree with o5nO9
It is commonly thought that last modes of technology to entertain at home such as smart TVs, high speed networking and soft tablets are getting a harmful impact on individuals" life in particular youngsters. This is some ideas that I am partly disagree with. The 21th century life style cannot be imagined without technologies as they are tye biggest part of the those who live in this century. Thus, people have good pastime that makes their life much better in other words, human beings, recent years, are capable of making themselves and their life much more colorful and amazing by use the modern technologies. If someone, for example, feels soo tired or extremely bored, that person can find oneself more happier on the funny TV shows or in playing video games, spontaneously, those entertainments are much more beneficial to human life, mood as well. As a result people can make their life much easier and happier with modern technologies. On the other side of the argument latest technological tools are likely to be harmful enough for people particularly youngs. It is mainly because if a schoolkid is allowed to surf on the net or next to the TV all day, that child's health system loose the stability what I mean by this is that if a person keeps watching TV or playing video games over two hours vision system becomes so tired and this leads the eye issue. And other words, if youngsters stick in to the mass media or video games, they may confuse their study way and as a result they are likely to become the lowest layer of community. In conclusion, with all vital points taken into account, I personally think that, modern technology may be negative fo youngs lives, however, in some cases they are very much needed for people.
It is
commonly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that last modes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to entertain at home such as smart TVs, high speed networking and soft tablets are getting a harmful impact on individuals
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in particular
youngsters. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
that I am partly
Consider using a past participle here: "disagreed".
disagree
with.

The
Please check the suffix, if this is an ordinal number.
21th
century
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style cannot
be imagined
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
as they are
Possible spelling mistake found.
tye
A determiner is probably missing here: "the biggest".
biggest
part of the those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in this century.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
pastime that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
better
in other words
, human beings, recent years, are capable of making themselves and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
more colorful and amazing by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
. If someone,
for example
, feels
Possible spelling mistake found.
soo
tired or
extremely
bored, that person can find oneself
Use only "happier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more happier
on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
TV
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
or in playing video games,
spontaneously
, those entertainments are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
more beneficial to human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, mood
as well
.
As a result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
easier and happier with modern technologies.

On the other side of the argument
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
technological tools are likely to be harmful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
particularly
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "young", the plural form of the noun 'young'?
youngs
. It is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if a schoolkid is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to surf on the net or
next
to the TV all day, that child's health system loose the stability what I mean by this is that if a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
watching TV or playing video games over two hours vision system becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
tired and this leads the eye issue. And other words, if youngsters stick in to the mass media or video games, they may confuse their study way and
as a result
they are likely to become the lowest layer of community.

In conclusion
, with all vital points taken into account, I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
Possible spelling mistake found.
fo
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "young", the plural form of the noun 'young'?
youngs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
however
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
much needed
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
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IELTS essay It is commonly thought that last modes of technology to entertain at home such as smart TVs, high speed networking and soft tablets are getting a harmful impact on individuals" life in particular youngsters. This is some ideas that I am partly disagree with

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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