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It is common nowadays for each member of the family to have their own piece of modern technology. some people think this will lead to a break down in family relationships and communication. To what extent do you agree?

It is common nowadays for each member of the family to have their own piece of modern technology. some people think this will lead to a break down in family relationships and communication. NqJ0
In this technological era, the usage of modern technological appliances seems to be inevitable anywhere and anytime, including our family environments. A large number of people including myself believe that the excessive use of those gadgets will lead to a toxic family relationship. I partially agree with the facts that excessive use of digital technologies lead to a toxic family relationship and I will share my reasons why. On one hand, the invention of gadgets has made teenagers avoid spending time with their family members and instead spend their free time opening their social media to communicate with their online friends instead of having a face to face communication with their parents. As we know, spending time with family is necessary for creating a healthy family relationship. The excessive use of gadgets slowly expands our distance between each family members which will possibly end up in a toxic relationship where fights will occur due to lack of communication between one family member and the other. On the other hand, however, development of technology in this millennium has proofed to be very useful during this COVID-19 pandemic. COVID-19 pandemic has restricted all family members from physically meeting each other at a certain place due to the strict enforcement of social distancing. Now, with the invention of online meeting applications such as Zoom and Google Meet has enabled all family members to meet each other virtually despite being located far away. This means that family members will be a little bit relieved to meet their other family members after not seeing them for some time despite it being online. In conclusion, despite the fact that excessive usage of gadgets leads to cracks in family relationships, the balanced usage of gadgets for family purposes will be useful to reunite long separated families.
In this technological era, the usage of modern technological appliances seems to be inevitable anywhere and anytime, including our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
environments.
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
A large number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
including myself believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
will lead to a toxic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the facts that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of digital technologies lead to a toxic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
and I will share my reasons why.

On one hand, the invention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
has made
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
avoid spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
and
instead
spend their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
opening their social media to communicate with their online friends
instead
of having a face to face communication with their parents. As we know, spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is necessary for creating a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
slowly
expands our distance between each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
which will
possibly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in a toxic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
where fights will occur due to lack of communication between one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
member
and the other.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
however
, development of technology in this millennium has proofed to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful during this COVID-19 pandemic. COVID-19 pandemic has restricted all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
from
physically
meeting each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
at a certain place due to the strict enforcement of social distancing.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, with the invention of online meeting applications such as Zoom and Google
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Meet
has enabled all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
virtually
despite
being located
far away. This means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
will be a
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
relieved to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
after not seeing them for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
despite it being online.

In conclusion
, despite the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
excessive
usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
leads to cracks in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
, the balanced usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gadgets
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
purposes will be useful to reunite long separated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
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IELTS essay It is common nowadays for each member of the family to have their own piece of modern technology. some people think this will lead to a break down in family relationships and communication.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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