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It is better for boys and girls to study separately rather than study in mixed-sex classes. They are less distracted and this leads to better results. v.2

It is better for boys and girls to study separately rather than study in mixed-sex classes. They are less distracted and this leads to better results. v. 2
Unlike in coeducation, boys and girls study separately in their own classes. Promoters of Separate sex classes believe that students could show better results while studying separately. I disagree that mixed sex classes distract the students from their education. Mixed sex classes have its own advantages and disadvantages. But, its advantages are much more than disadvantages. One of the key advantages of coeducation is the high level of competition among boys and girls. It is natural and obvious that students try to be ahead of opposite gender, and they work harder and focus on their studies to gain the higher rank. This is also true for extra-curricular activities where boys and girls participate together in various activities. Another advantage of mixed sex classes is the confidence. Students of coeducation have a high-level confidence and they can talk without shyness in front of opposite gender. This will greatly help them in their professional life. Higher confidence also plays a vital role in their interpersonal skills and overall personality. In addition to these, most of the colleges and universities do not have separate classes for boys and girls, so children already studying in coeducation never face any adjustment problem in mixed-sex classes in colleges and universities. In the end, it is concluded that boys and girls studying in mixed-sex classes are not distracted due to coeducation. In fact, distraction varies from person to person. A student who studies separately can be more distracted due to the absence of opposite gender, and waste the precious study time finding the solution of such distraction.
Unlike in coeducation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
separately
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
. Promoters of Separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
better results while studying
separately
. I disagree that mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
distract the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from their education.

Mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
are much more than disadvantages. One of the key
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
of coeducation is the high level of competition among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
. It is natural and obvious that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
try to be ahead of opposite gender, and they work harder and focus on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
to gain the higher rank. This is
also
true for extra-curricular activities where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
participate together in various activities.

Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
of mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
is the confidence.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
of coeducation have a high-level
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
confidence and
they can talk without shyness in front of opposite gender. This will
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in their professional life. Higher confidence
also
plays a vital role in their interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
overall
personality.
In addition
to these, most of the colleges and universities do not have separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
children already studying in coeducation never face any adjustment problem in mixed-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
in colleges and universities.

In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, it
is concluded
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
studying in mixed-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
are not distracted due to coeducation.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
fact, distraction varies from person to person. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
separately
can be more distracted due to the absence of opposite gender, and waste the precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
time finding the solution of such distraction.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay It is better for boys and girls to study separately rather than study in mixed-sex classes. They are less distracted and this leads to better results. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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