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It is argued that the world has been changed in a good direction by technology. It makes our planet becomes worth living in and affects to many aspect of life. According to my experience, I absolutely agree with this opinion.

It is argued that the world has been changed in a good direction by technology. It makes our planet becomes worth living in and affects to many aspect of life. According to my experience, I absolutely agree with this opinion. AwQo3
It is argued that the world has been changed in a good direction by technology. It makes our planet becomes worth living in and affects to many aspect of life. According to my experience, I absolutely agree with this opinion. I believed that technology has made our life more enjoyable than it used to be. Along with the development of technology, an increasing number of amusement centers where people come to relieve stress were built. After a busy week, people usually go to these centers with family, which will increase the connection between them and their families. Besides that, many other entertainment venues like cinema, pub and museum have sprung up. For instance, there isn’t anyone who went to the supermarket without necessary occasion many years ago; but now, there is a plenty of people who do shopping like a leisure activity. Heretofore, people had to work hard for a living and they don’t have to do like at that time now, so it require more activities to entertain. Another benefit is that technology makes it is easier to work and living. Almost machines are automated and helps people in manufacture. Oldtimer, people used buffalos to plow the fields but now machines do this work, it even gives more productivity than doing by hand. Furthermore, the technology’s development helps human do the things which seem impossible like flying to the sky, meeting a person who lives very far away or learing at home. A relevant exemplified is that when people don’t want to cook, they just order some food and it will be shipped door-to door after a few minutes. To sum up, thanks to technology, our life has been better and better. It will rapidly develop in order to offer a worthy life to human.
It
is argued
that the world has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
direction by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
our planet becomes worth living in and affects to
Possible agreement error. The noun aspect seems to be countable; consider using: "many aspects".
many aspect
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. According to my experience, I
absolutely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.

I believed that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has made our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
more enjoyable than it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be. Along with the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, an increasing number of amusement centers where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to relieve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
were built
. After a busy week,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
usually
go to these centers with family, which will increase the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
connection between
them and their families.
Besides
that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other entertainment venues like cinema, pub and museum have sprung up.
For instance
, there isn’t anyone who went to the supermarket without necessary occasion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years ago;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do shopping like a leisure activity. Heretofore,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
had to work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
living and
they don’t
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do like at that time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it
Did you mean "requires"?
require
more activities to entertain.

Another benefit is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it is easier to work and living. Almost machines
are automated
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in manufacture.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Oldtimer
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "buffalo", the plural form of the noun 'buffalo'?
buffalos
to plow the fields
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
machines do this work, it even gives more productivity than doing by hand.
Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology’s
development
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
human do the things which seem impossible like flying to the sky, meeting a person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
far away or
Possible spelling mistake found.
learing
at home. A relevant exemplified is that when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don’t want to cook, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
order
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
food and it will
be shipped
door-to door after a few minutes.

To sum up, thanks to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has been better and better. It will
rapidly
develop in order to offer a worthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
to human.
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IELTS essay It is argued that the world has been changed in a good direction by technology. It makes our planet becomes worth living in and affects to many aspect of life. According to my experience, I absolutely agree with this opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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