Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is argued that non academic subjects like physical education, cookery and home science should not be taught at schools and the sole focus should be on academic subjects considering the growing burden on childrens minds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that non academic subjects like physical education, cookery and home science should not be taught at schools and the sole focus should be on academic subjects considering the growing burden on childrens minds. LLmop
Each youngsters life starts from school subjects. They are specially organised at schools to bestows literacy and basic practical skills in various areas of life. Some people believe that academic subjects are most necessary for achieving success and remove the extracurricular subjects but i personally believe that non academic subjects should be taught in schools. To embark with, by studying non academic subjects which leads to relax the mind of students. If students want to concentrate on their study then they should participate in extracurricular subjects such as painting, music and so on which tends to help to eradicate the stress on the student mind and they will feel relax. To justify, a physical period is very essential in schools. Due to physical period, students play divergent genre of games which help to fresh the minds of students. Therefore, non academic subjects is very pivotal in student life. Moreover, students can develop creativity in their personality by performing such types of activities. With doing the extra things, a person always develop their skills as well as its helpful to broaden their horizons. Furthermore, some students are not brilliant in academics. In those cases non- academic subjects is very beneficial to bring out hidden talents of students which leads to help in make their career in further time as well as its make a better person in society. For instance, a student does not need a 'A' grade in Physics or Mathematics to be a successful singer, writer or painter. In addition to, many virtual and life skills such as victory or defeat light feelings can be develop in youngsters which are quite lucrative later stages of life. It helps to increase patience level in students by participating in various types of competition. To recapitulate, co-curriculum subjects is most pivotal in students life because this plays a big role for students good health but we cannot neglect academic subjects as a its had s big hand to enhance the knowledge of students.
Each
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "youngsters'" or "youngster's"?
youngsters
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. They are
specially
Possible spelling mistake. 'organised' is British English.
organised
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
to
The verb after "to" should be in the base form: "bestow".
bestows
literacy and basic practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in various areas of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are most necessary for achieving success and remove the extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
personally
believe that non
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
should
be taught
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. To embark with, by studying non
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which leads to relax the mind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
want to concentrate on their study then they should participate in extracurricular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as painting, music and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on which tends to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to eradicate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mind and
they will feel relax. To justify, a physical period is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. Due to physical period,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
play divergent genre of games which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to fresh the minds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Therefore
, non
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
pivotal in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can develop creativity in their personality by performing such types of activities. With doing the extra things, a person always develop their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as well
as
Did you mean "it's" (="it is") instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
its
helpful to broaden their horizons.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are not brilliant in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academics
. In those cases non-
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial to bring out hidden talents of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
which leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their career in
further
time
as well
as its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a better person in society.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
does not need a 'A' grade in Physics or Mathematics to be a successful singer, writer or painter.
In addition
to,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
virtual and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as victory or defeat light feelings can be
Consider using the past participle "developed"?
develop
in youngsters which are quite lucrative later stages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to increase patience level in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
by participating in various types of competition. To recapitulate, co-curriculum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is most pivotal in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this plays a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
role for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we cannot neglect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
as
A determiner cannot combine with a possessive pronoun. Did you mean simply "its had" or "a had"?
a its had
s
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
hand to enhance the knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay It is argued that non academic subjects like physical education, cookery and home science should not be taught at schools and the sole focus should be on academic subjects considering the growing burden on childrens minds.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
331 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 5.5band
    Robots can replace the human employment.
    Human jobs have been taking by artificially intelligent robots are increasingly. There are people believe that eventually robot can be done all work. While others believe that only limited jobs which is robots can be done. This essay will discuss about why robots can replace all of the human employm...
  • 5.5band
    development in urban economic development
    After I read a development article, it confirms my existing view about urban economic development. This is because the author questions the ideas of speculative urbanism in sub-Saharan Africa’s targeted cities. These cities are revised the image to attract international investors which will benefit ...
  • 5band
    The topic is introduce yourself
    My name is Dan. I'm 19 years old. Now I am an second year student. I study at Qui Nhon Unniversity, I'm in English pedagogy. My hometown is in Tay Son District, Binh Dinh Province. I live in a village with my family. There are four people in my family: my parent, my younger sister and me. My father ...
  • 5.5band
    Perception of the English Teachers on Transformational Teaching Strategy: Bases for Transformative Learning Program
    This scholarly study determines the Perception of the English Teachers on Transformational Teaching Strategy: Bases for Transformative Learning Program among select public high school English Teachers in Balanga City and Bataan who currently teacher 7th grade students. There are (100) English Teache...
  • 5.5band
    is the climate change going to control in the future.
    Nowadays, climate change is important to human, people are interesting to work on the study of climate change. There are people believe that eventually easy to work on the study of climate change, while others believe that, it is the significant to do that, even when they have a lot of times for it....
  • 6band
    WHAT FORM OF TRANSPORT DO YOU PREFER TO USE? WHY?
    Nowadays, we have many kind of vehicles such as: motorbike; car; bus; truck; bikecycle…and so on. According to using arm, we can choose one or more kind of vehicles. In my point of view, we just buy one kind of vehicles that we need to use to move, not according to our favorite. For me, I choose mot...





Get more results for topic:
  • It is argued that non academic subjects like physical education, cookery and home science should not be taught at schools and the sole focus should be on academic subjects considering the growing burden on childrens minds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?