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It is argued that most people nowadays consider traditional or religious festivals as the times you have fun and no longer remember the original meanings of those festivals. to what extent do you agree or disagree

It is argued that most people nowadays consider traditional or religious festivals as the times you have fun and no longer remember the original meanings of those festivals. XlYKE
It is argued that most people nowadays consider traditional or religious festivals as the times you have fun and no longer remember the original meanings of those festivals. Personally, I agree that relaxing and enjoyment are the primary purposes of people during festival periods, whereas I disagree with the idea that most people have forgotten what these festivals mean. On the one hand, it is obvious that people nowadays love to use the festival periods to celebrate. They work too much and do not have time for relaxation, and therefore, some days off during festivals are great opportunities to see their families and friends and have great celebrations. Lunar New Year, for example, is the most well-known and important traditional festival in Vietnam. We usually watch fireworks at the last night of the year, visit our relatives and have parties with friends during the festival, rather than talk about what it means or when it first took place. However, I believe that people still remember and want to preserve the special meanings of conventional and religious festivals. Families and schools play an important role in preserving and developing traditional values of festivals, and they are doing well. Children are taught about history, culture, and conventional customs. For example, although talking about the meaning of Lunar New Year does not happen frequently but if asked about that, every Vietnamese student will answer similarly that it is the time to commemorate the gods and our ancestors. The government also introduces some regulations to encourage the young generations to learn about the original values of traditional festivals and to preserve them. In conclusion, although people have a tendency to prioritize enjoyment and relaxation during festivals, I believe that they still remember the special stories behind those events.
It
is argued
that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
or religious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
as the times you have fun and no longer remember the original meanings of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that relaxing and enjoyment are the primary purposes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
periods, whereas I disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have forgotten what these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
mean.

On the one hand, it is obvious that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
periods to celebrate. They work too much and do not have time for relaxation, and
therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
days off during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
are great opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
their families and friends and have great celebrations. Lunar New Year,
for example
, is the most well-known and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
in Vietnam. We
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
fireworks at the last night of the year, visit our relatives and have parties with friends during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
,
rather
than talk about what it means or when it
first
took place.

However
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
remember and want to preserve the special meanings of conventional and religious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
. Families and schools play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in preserving and developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
values of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, and they are doing well. Children
are taught
about history, culture, and conventional customs.
For example
, although talking about the meaning of Lunar New Year does not happen
frequently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if asked about that, every Vietnamese student will answer
similarly
that it is the time to commemorate the gods and our ancestors. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
also
introduces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regulations to encourage the young generations to learn about the original values of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
and to preserve them.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a tendency to prioritize enjoyment and relaxation during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, I believe that they
still
remember the special stories behind those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.
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IELTS essay It is argued that most people nowadays consider traditional or religious festivals as the times you have fun and no longer remember the original meanings of those festivals.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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