Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Is there a relationship between peer pressure and students’ self-development?

Is there a relationship between peer pressure and students’ self-development? BYJGm
In my essay, I intend to demonstrate that positive peer pressure is beneficial to self-development and that even negative peer pressure can benefit some people. I believe that positive peer pressure can motivate people to succeed and that resisting negative peer pressure can help people develop character. Peer pressure refers to the social impact that members of your peer group have on you. People who like to impress others are more likely to succumb to peer pressure than those who have more to lose by leaving their group. Gangs in the United States are a good illustration of people who have more to lose. Members of the band will frequently have little else going on in their lives to allow them to leave their squad. If they are forced to do something for the gang, they are more vulnerable since they cannot risk losing their band membership. Positive peer pressure, I believe, can motivate a person to succeed. This appears to be demonstrated through sports and competitive events. People who participate in competitive events are often compelled to work hard by their willpower and the expectation that they will perform well. When a competitor performs well, their peers adore them. If a competitor performs well, they may face ridicule, threats, and even violence. Because of peer pressure, competitors in sporting and competitive events are encouraged to do well and flourish. Peer pressure has both benefits and drawbacks, but on the whole, it can aid a person's emotional and social development. Beneficial peer pressure can have negative consequences, but the result is usually upbeat. On the other hand, if a person can recognize and resist negative peer pressure, it can significantly impact their personal development. It may also assist that individual in maturing because a mature person can risk putting something on the line to grow.
In my essay, I intend to demonstrate that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
is beneficial to self-development and that even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
can benefit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
can motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to succeed and that resisting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
develop character.

Peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
refers to the social impact that members of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
group have on you.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
like to impress others are more likely to succumb to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
than those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have more to lose by leaving their group. Gangs in the United States are a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
illustration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have more to lose. Members of the band will
frequently
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
else going on in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their squad. If they
are forced
to do something for the gang, they are more vulnerable since they cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
losing their band membership.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
, I believe, can motivate a person to succeed. This appears to
be demonstrated
through sports and competitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
participate in competitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
compelled to work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
by their willpower and the expectation that they will perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
. When a competitor performs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peers
adore them. If a competitor performs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
, they may face ridicule, threats, and even violence.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
, competitors in sporting and competitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
are encouraged
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
and flourish.

Peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
has both benefits and drawbacks,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
on the whole
, it can aid a person's emotional and social development. Beneficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
can have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
consequences,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the result is
usually
upbeat.
On the other hand
, if a person can recognize and resist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
, it can
significantly
impact their personal development. It may
also
assist that individual in maturing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a mature person can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
putting something on the line to grow.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Is there a relationship between peer pressure and students’ self-development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts