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Is televised talent shows a good method of finding talented people?

Is televised talent shows a good method of finding talented people? NVgw0
In many contemporary societies, televised talent shows have become very popular over the past decade with shows such as “American Idol”, “The Apprentice”, “Survivor”, and “Big Brother” attracting big audiences. However, it is a well establish notion that every man is born with a unique innate talent. So there is no shade of doubt that among the seven billion men living in the globe has at least one talent of them are unique trait. Most of the cases, it is very difficult for them to parade the world what they are capable of doing. Talent show, indeed, is a wonderful platform for them to manifest their talent. In this instance, many people think that these shows are an excellent approach for hunting the veiled talents, while others oppose the view and claim that it is nothing but amusement. In the following discussion I will show both the points have some merits.
In
many
contemporary societies, televised
talent
shows
have become
very
popular over the past decade with
shows
such as “American Idol”, “The Apprentice”, “Survivor”, and “
Big
Brother” attracting
big
audiences.
However
, it is a well establish notion that every
man
is born
with a unique innate
talent
.
So
there is no shade of doubt that among the seven billion
men
living in the globe has at least one
talent
of them
are unique
trait. Most of the cases, it is
very
difficult for them to parade the world what they are capable of doing.
Talent
show
,
indeed
, is a wonderful platform for them to manifest their
talent
. In this instance,
many
people
think
that these
shows
are an excellent approach for hunting the veiled
talents
, while others oppose the view and claim that it is nothing
but
amusement. In the following discussion I will
show
both the points have
some
merits.
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IELTS essay Is televised talent shows a good method of finding talented people?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
151 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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