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Is modern music good for teenagers?

Is modern music good for teenagers? E733q
Needless to say, music is one of the most essential things in people's lives. The more improved we are, the more genre of music is created including modern music, which is argued of its pros and cons to young people. In this following essay, I will discuss both sides and give my point of view about this. Everything has its drawback and so do modern music. Listening to modern music too frequently makes teenagers forget their traditional music. Many countries have beautiful genres of music and it is worthy for them to try once. Moreover, modern music may cause a negative effect on youth's minds. Young people may not concentrate on what they are doing. This may cause an accident if they drove the car due to a lack of hearing or a detrimental lifestyle. Last but not least, noise pollution is also a considered problem. Some people play music and do karaoke at night, which annoys their neighborhood while they are sleeping. Therefore, parents must raise their children's awareness and advice them on what is best to listen. But there are a lot of positive effects when listening to modern music. Modern music help people increase happiness and joy, creates influence for them to live. Music can erase your bad mood and stress and modern music are able to do, too. In addition, supporting modern music allow creativity to spread, which means songwriter can come up with new ideas without any limitations. Moreover, modern music will bring new wind into the music industry, which may easily get bored if we usually listen to it. Thus, people should accept and try on this type of music like hip-hop, etc. . . To sum up, modern music still has its drawbacks but everything has its pros and cons. Why don't we give modern music a shot? I'm sure you will not disappointed.
Needless to say,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is one of the most essential things in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
we are, the more genre of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is created
including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, which
is argued
of its pros and cons to young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In this following essay, I will discuss both sides and give my point of view about this.

Everything has its drawback and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. Listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
too
frequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
forget their traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
countries have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
genres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and it is worthy for them to try once.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
may cause a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on youth's minds. Young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may not concentrate on what they are doing. This may cause an accident if they drove the car due to a lack of hearing or a detrimental lifestyle. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, noise pollution is
also
a considered problem.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and do karaoke at night, which annoys their neighborhood while they are sleeping.
Therefore
, parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
raise their children's awareness and advice them on what is best to listen.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects when listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
increase happiness and joy, creates influence for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
can erase your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
mood and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
are able to do, too.
In addition
, supporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
creativity to spread, which means songwriter can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
without any limitations.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
will bring new wind into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
industry, which may
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
bored if we
usually
listen to it.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should accept and try on this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
like hip-hop, etc.
Two consecutive dots
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
still
has its drawbacks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
everything has its pros and cons. Why don't we give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
a shot? I'm sure you will not
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "disappoint"
disappointed
.
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IELTS essay Is modern music good for teenagers?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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