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Integrated speaking 3-2)The Torch The university newspaper, The Torch, is now taking applications from students who are interested in joining the staff. There are several different positions available and experience in journalism is not required. This is v.1

Integrated speaking 3-2)The Torch The university newspaper, The Torch, is now taking applications from students who are interested in joining the staff. There are several different positions available and experience in journalism is not required. This is v. 1
Third world countries are facing many issues today. Hence, basic amenities such as job satisfaction could be considered as a luxury there. This essay would explore various reasons behind it and whether job satisfaction is vital or not. The education level in developing countries is limited, and consequently job opportunities are also scarce. Hence, people give more emphasis on finding some job rather than the best one. Secondly, the population of such countries is also very large but the job opportunities are less. Therefore, many people fight for the same position, and as a result, people people take whatever jobs they are offered. For instance, Syria is facing an emergency situation due to which no multinational company wants to invest in that country which has limited the job options for youth there. Though job satisfaction is rare, I believe that it is very important for an overall growth. It provides mental peace in a person's life which ultimately leads to happiness. If an individual is not contended with his job, he would not be able to do it for a long period of time. Job satisfaction prompts a person to excel in what they are doing and improving in that field. A recent research concluded that an organization who annually appraise their employees grow more than the ones who does not. Job satisfaction is considered as a luxury in some developing countries as it is difficult to find a job in such countries due to various circumstances which make the primary necessity of people to bag a job rather that various luxuries and if they get them, it is like a cherry on the cake for them. I think that job satisfaction is mandatory as it motivates a person to work better.
Third world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
issues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
Hence
, basic amenities such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
could
be considered
as a luxury there. This essay would explore various reasons behind it and whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is vital or not.

The education level in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is limited
, and
consequently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities are
also
scarce.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give more emphasis on finding
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
rather
than the best one.
Secondly
, the population of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
large
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities are less.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
fight for the same position, and
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take whatever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
they
are offered
.
For instance
, Syria is facing an emergency situation due to which no multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
wants to invest in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which has limited the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
options for youth there.

Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is rare, I believe that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for an
overall
growth. It provides mental peace in a person's life which
ultimately
leads to happiness. If an individual is not contended with his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, he would not be able to do it for a long period of time.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
prompts a person to excel in what they are doing and improving in that field. A recent research concluded that an organization who
annually
appraise their employees grow more than the ones who
Did you mean "do"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'ones' should be used.
does
not.

Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is considered
as a luxury in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as it is difficult to find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
due to various circumstances which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the primary necessity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to bag a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
rather
that various luxuries and if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them, it is like a cherry on the cake for them. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is mandatory as it motivates a person to work better.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Integrated speaking 3-2)The Torch The university newspaper, The Torch, is now taking applications from students who are interested in joining the staff. There are several different positions available and experience in journalism is not required. This is v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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