Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Increasing number of thieves among the youngsters

Increasing number of thieves among the youngsters 9rbOX
Lots of nations face the problems about increasing numbers of immature people that are committing crimes. I will write triggers of these Dilemma and the ways to decide it. Every country has its own economic system. A number of countries are wealthy, while other Nations are struggling to make money. Even though, all these countries have one common Issue. Rising count of young people, which are becoming thieves. One of the biggest cause of this serious problem is difficulties with money. Not every family has enough budget for good lifestyle, to take education and live without rejection. So, the lack of fee will lead to go to commit crimes, because these teens believe, that it is the easiest path to take cash Second reason why they do that is because some teenagers too are lazy to work. Job needs significant time and effort, but it is only real way to earning. However, juveniles that are making thieves don’t even look to work’s side. They think: “Why do I have to be hired, when I can make money faster? “ They totally forget about policemen that can catch them, or don’t have compassion about people that are working for make this budget. To decrease crime rate, government should make several steps. Firstly, upgrade quality of life of their habitats. If each family has enough amount of money to live feeling happy, they won’t commit crime. Likewise, if government change the psychology of the citizens, and teach how essential is hard work and strong willpower, the percentage of criminality among the youngsters will decrease. However, government can’t solve all the problems. Each family should know the methods to upbring their children very well, instruct them only good things, including ways to become wealthy by light path
Lots of nations face the problems about increasing numbers of immature
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that are committing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. I will write triggers of these Dilemma and the ways to decide it.

Every country has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
economic system. A number of countries are wealthy, while other Nations are struggling to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
Even though
, all these countries have one common Issue. Rising count of young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, which are becoming thieves. One of the biggest cause of this serious problem is difficulties with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. Not every family has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
budget for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
lifestyle, to take education and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
without rejection.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the lack of fee will lead to go to commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these teens believe, that it is the easiest path to take cash

Second reason why they do
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
too are lazy to work. Job needs significant time and effort,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
real way to earning.
However
, juveniles that are making thieves don’t even look to work’s side. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
: “Why do I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be hired
, when I can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
faster? “ They
totally
forget about policemen that can catch them, or don’t have compassion about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that are working for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
this budget.

To decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
several steps.
Firstly
, upgrade quality of life of their habitats. If each family has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
feeling happy, they won’t commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Likewise
, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the psychology of the citizens, and teach how essential is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and strong willpower, the percentage of criminality among the youngsters will decrease.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can’t solve all the problems. Each family should know the methods to
Possible spelling mistake found.
upbring
their children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well, instruct them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
things, including ways to become wealthy by light
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
path
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Increasing number of thieves among the youngsters

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts