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Incessant violence has ratcheted up public interest in the question of how to curb violence. Although some believe that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies to do this, I believe that this measure would be unworkable and there are more acceptable measures.

Incessant violence has ratcheted up public interest in the question of how to curb violence. Although some believe that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies to do this, I believe that this measure would be unworkable and there are more acceptable measures. aQ0Gw
Incessant violence has ratcheted up public interest in the question of how to curb violence. Although some believe that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies to do this, I believe that this measure would be unworkable and there are more acceptable measures. Firstly, reducing the need for residents to travel for work, study or shopping purposes is impractical. No matter how effectively modern technologies allow us to work, study, or carry out online transactions, most of us still prefer face-to-face interactions, perpetuating the need to travel. This can be seen in the way business people choose to meet up halfway at a café to discuss a deal, how students prefer discussing an idea or a lesson at their school campus, and how we enjoy going to shopping malls. With our society still putting a significant amount of importance on real-life day-to-day conversations and interactions, the proposed scheme would not work.
Incessant violence has ratcheted up public interest in the question of how to curb violence. Although
some
believe that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies to do this, I believe that this measure would be unworkable and there are more acceptable measures.
Firstly
, reducing the need for residents to travel for work, study or shopping purposes is impractical. No matter how
effectively
modern technologies
allow
us to work, study, or carry out online transactions, most of us
still
prefer face-to-face interactions, perpetuating the need to travel. This can be
seen
in the way business
people
choose to
meet
up halfway at a café to discuss a deal, how students prefer discussing an
idea
or a lesson at their school campus, and how we enjoy going to shopping malls. With our society
still
putting a significant amount of importance on real-life day-to-day conversations and interactions, the proposed scheme would not work.
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IELTS essay Incessant violence has ratcheted up public interest in the question of how to curb violence. Although some believe that parents should teach children not to hit back at bullies to do this, I believe that this measure would be unworkable and there are more acceptable measures.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
154 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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