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In this modern civilization, the vast majority of people have been involved in computer pertinent activities since its discovery, but the number of young people trying to engage in various types of online related games.

In this modern civilization, the vast majority of people have been involved in computer pertinent activities since its discovery, but the number of young people trying to engage in various types of online related games. KW8RL
In this modern civilization, the vast majority of people have been involved in computer pertinent activities since its discovery, but the number of young people trying to engage in various types of online related games. As a result, many young people are disconnected from their studies and have problems with their health. There are numerous problems can be happened by playing digital games. Firstly, if anyone is involved in online games, it would be immensely challenging for them to leave the games. However, when the youth are too connected to online games, they lose their focus on study. For instance, one of my acquaintances who was extremely brilliant on their studies, but when he has concentrated in the games, he had lost all his interest to studies. Furthermore, few more vital problems can be noticed when children are involved in computer related games, such as their weight getting increased as well as eyesight can be reduced. To diminish these kinds of Matters young people must play outdoor sports frequently, such as Football, Cricket and Baseball, etc. Otherwise, it would be impossible to reduce these problems. Moreover, parents have to be strict on their side because they can only conduct their children properly. Therefore, without monitoring the juveniles perfectly, it would not be feasible to wrap up these kinds of stuff. In conclusion, playing computer related games not a big problem but if any youth trying to involve to the games deeply, parents ought to be vigilant in their children
In this modern civilization, the vast majority of
people
have
been involved
in computer pertinent activities since its discovery,
but
the number of young
people
trying to engage in various types of online related
games
.
As a result
,
many
young
people
are disconnected
from their
studies
and have
problems
with their health.

There are numerous
problems
can
be happened
by playing digital
games
.
Firstly
, if anyone
is involved
in online
games
, it would be
immensely
challenging for them to
leave
the
games
.
However
, when the youth are too connected to online
games
, they lose their focus on
study
.
For instance
, one of my acquaintances who was
extremely
brilliant on their
studies
,
but
when he has concentrated in the
games
, he had lost all his interest to
studies
.
Furthermore
, few more vital
problems
can
be noticed
when children
are involved
in computer related
games
, such as their weight getting increased
as well
as eyesight can be
reduced
.

To diminish these kinds of Matters young
people
must
play outdoor sports
frequently
, such as Football, Cricket and Baseball, etc.
Otherwise
, it would be impossible to
reduce
these
problems
.
Moreover
, parents
have to
be strict on their side
because
they can
only
conduct their children
properly
.
Therefore
, without monitoring the juveniles
perfectly
, it would not be feasible to wrap up these kinds of stuff.

In conclusion
, playing computer related
games
not a
big
problem
but
if any youth trying to involve to the
games
deeply
, parents ought to be vigilant in their children
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IELTS essay In this modern civilization, the vast majority of people have been involved in computer pertinent activities since its discovery, but the number of young people trying to engage in various types of online related games.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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