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In these days crime news are showing more and more in tv and newspaper. Some people said, it is bad for society. Do you agree or disagree.

In these days crime news are showing more and more in tv and newspaper. Some people said, it is bad for society. gDdJ3
Crime can involve violence, sex and drug but also discrimination road rager, undeclared work and burglary. According to few stratum of the society, now a days crimes are showing more in television and newspaper. Few people believe that it is not good for society. So, under this proclamation, I would like to explicate it at length before giving my verdict on the same. To initiate with there are copious points to support this argument. The first indispensable aspect is, children may get embolded by crime thriller films and they may do distinct types of delequency. Secondly, many TV channels are filled with porn videos and pupils watch these videos without awareness of their parents. However, opposite people deems that bureaucrats must show crime news in television. To epitome, if any person get capital punishment for their crime, then plethora of people committ less heinous crime, if the know the punishment for crime would be death. Naturally, people are affraid to die. Moreover, this punishment shows no sympathy for the criminals. And, heinous crime like sex offence, kidnapping and burglary can be drastically reduced. According to my observations, bureaucrats increased the number of police on roads, wheather on foot or petrol cars. Owing to this, criminals would less likely to committ any crimes. In conclusion after considering all the view points it is clear that, crime is increasing at an alarming rate. Crimes are also done by modern technology. Profuse number of confidentiality information have hacked and various banks account credentials of individuals were leaked. So, masses may be aware while watching crimes news in newspaper and television.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Crime
can involve violence, sex and drug
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
discrimination road
Possible spelling mistake found.
rager
, undeclared work and burglary. According
Did you mean "too"?
to
Possible agreement error. The noun stratum seems to be countable; consider using: "few strata", "few stratums".
few stratum
of the society,
Did you mean "nowadays"?
now a days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are showing more in television and newspaper. Few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, under this proclamation, I would like to explicate it at length
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
giving my verdict on the same.

To initiate with there are copious points to support this argument. The
first
indispensable aspect is, children may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake found.
embolded
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
thriller
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
films and
they may do distinct types of
Possible spelling mistake found.
delequency
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
TV channels
are filled
with porn videos and pupils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
these videos without awareness of their parents.

However
, opposite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
deems
that bureaucrats
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
news in television. To epitome, if any person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
capital punishment for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, then plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
committ
less heinous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, if the know the punishment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
would be death.
Naturally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
affraid
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
.
Moreover
, this punishment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
no sympathy for the criminals. And, heinous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
like sex
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
, kidnapping and burglary can be
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. According to my observations, bureaucrats increased the number of police on roads,
Possible spelling mistake found.
wheather
on foot or petrol cars. Owing to this, criminals would less likely to
Possible spelling mistake found.
committ
any crimes.

In conclusion
after considering all the view points it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is increasing at an alarming rate.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Crimes
are
also
done by modern technology. Profuse number of confidentiality information have hacked and various banks account credentials of individuals
were leaked
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, masses may be aware while watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
news in newspaper and television.
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IELTS essay In these days crime news are showing more and more in tv and newspaper. Some people said, it is bad for society.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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